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*Sigh* Can’t We All Just Get Along?
I've been doing a lot of Youtube browsing for pole vids the last few weeks since the lovely cold weather is keeping me off my baby aside from the random move here and there, and I'm getting really sick of fellow polers bashing on dancers who embrace the sexier side of pole dancing. I've seen some pretty nasty comments on some of Alethea Austin's videos–and the worst part is, they're not from random dumbasses with their oh-so-intelligent contributions of 'hEy, caN u do DAt shit on nEtiNg Else, no wAt i meen hee hee,' they're from people also involved in the poling community who think sexy dancing demeans 'the sport' and sets back the whole community and doing away with the negative stereotypes pole is still deluged with.
Bashing other polers for the way they dance accomplishes nothing, IMHO. When you make derogatory comments referring to Alethea or other BeSpun dancers or anyone with a sexier style as skanks or sluts, you're just creating division and making yourself look bad. I don't understand why people have to stick their noses up at something just because it is not to their preference.
Personally, I got into pole dancing because of the potential sexiness of it. I appreciate the more gymnastic performances for their awe-inspiring strength and flexibility, but it's not my preferred dance style. I started out with S Factor, which highlights the sensual, feminine side of pole dancing and I enjoy that aspect of it. I like putting on a pair of sexy shoes and hip rolling my way around the pole. I like floorwork–I like taking off articles of clothing from a CKR. What is wrong with that? It isn't as though the sexy dancers of the pole community are frantically getting themselves off in front of an audience of horrified onlookers. I think it would be a shame if we stripped pole of all its sensuality, honestly.
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27 Replies
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amen.
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Totally agree. I watch Alethea's videos too but have to say I haven't see many negative comments regarding her dancing. I have however, seen some disgustingly derogatory comments on Leighann Orsi's videos but mostly to the effect of 'dirty sluts can come dance on my pole' etc. In fact, recently I was watching a dirdybirdy tutorial and seen a comment something to the effect of sluts being hunted near their homes so their bodies are easier to hide or something twisted to that effect. I remember reading it and feeling sick in my stomach that somebody could look at a girl having fun like that and think she deserves to be harmed for it. Equally, I know exactly what you mean about the other comments on pole videos, like the critical, nasty comments about the dancer's body (I remember watching one video of a girl in ballet pumps and she received a horrible grilling from many posters, with one even referring to her as ''a thick short girl not much grace and not much toe for real''. Whoever wrote such a nasty comment needs a wake up call or even a bit of happiness in her life because her attitude wreaks of jealousy.
You would think that, amidst the comments from sleazy, lonely men, fellow polers and dancers would make more of an effort to support eachother rather than name calling and critisizing, not only the dance but the dancer and her body aswell. How very sad!!
I agree that sexy dancing is getting an awful amount of criticism, which is kind of funny really because such fitness polers would not be sitting pretty on their pole in the comfort of their living room, had these sexy performers not paved the way for them in the first place, Didn't pantera begin dancing in clubs? And how many fitness studios has she sold out workshops in? The debate is futile. In fact, I feel a bit embarrassed about how some women conduct themselves during discussions of pole and sexuality. It's great that we can take part in an art that can be enjoyed in so many ways, be it sexy, athletic, etc and that it is so open and versatile that we can choose ourselves what way we want to enjoy it. These women need to back off. I don't sexy dance because, well frankly, I don't know how to. But I do not begrudge the women who do. I watch their videos with as much admiration as I watch any athletic performance. There's something so impressive about every individual dance and it makes me sad to think there's some kind of divide out there. Live and let live I say. Maybe focus a little more on your own style and worry less about somebody else's.
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Several prominent pole dancers started out working in clubs. Sarah Creutel danced at one point, and I believe I read somewhere that at one point Felix worked in a club. I'm pretty sure Pantera did, too, like you said, so I don't understand why some polers feel the need to crap all over women who have a clubish style.
Besides, good floorwork itself requires strength, grace and flexibility; I think it's beautiful all on its own.
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totally agree! although my style is not very sexy (because i suck at head rolls and hip rolls) I am in awe of the sensual dancers out there. I had a class with Bobbi and I asked whether she ever struggles to look sexy and graceful and she replied 'all the time'! It annoys me that there's people out there that thinks a sexy pole dance automatically means they have no talent or are strippers.
and polefairy – i know dirdy, can't believe someone posted that about her! never saw the comment… she is so so lovely
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A sexy body roll was waaay harder for me to conquer than, say, a nice, controlled shoulder mount. Sexy is not easy; doing moves that require massive amounts of strength and grace while still managing to make them look polished and graceful and sensual is often times harder than the trick itself, I think.
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Yep I tried to find the comment there but maybe it's been removed? I'm sure the girl's name was dirdybirdy and if I remember correctly she was wearing socks in her routine because I remember thinking they looked cool. But I cannot find the comment now. Disgusting anyway.
Haha nice to know even Bobbi has to try hard, there's hope yet coz she is one bangin' lady!
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It probably was–there's a pole dancer on YT by that username and she does some sexier dancing. She has some nice tutorials for more basic pole moves. I like her style–I think she's a beautiful, classy dancer.
Bobbi is smoking. I was watching both of her pole DVDs the other day just to get a feel for everything that's on them even though I can't pole much right now, and I was just in awe of her body. Especially because I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that she is in her 40's.
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Amen. I personally do not have a sexy personality so I don't even attempt to dance that way, lol. I totally respect the girls who can pull off sexy. Besides, it would be boring if everyone danced the exact same way.
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It's so sad and disheartening that people bash sexy pole dancers. One of the main things I love about pole dancing is that it empowers us and our sensuality. We learn to honor and respect it, to welcome it, not to be afraid of it. Women are discovering that being sexy isn't dirty. People who come along and make the comments are really just perves because they have a perverted opion of the human form and sensual being.
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I agree!! I got so mad when I found this comment on one of Oona Kivelas video.
"i LOVE how she has perfect form and beautifully pointed toes the entire time! and she doesnt slut it up unlike A LOT of pro polers!!
i cant stand how a lot of the pro's like alethia austin, leigh ann and karol helms act like its a strip act!!
its a breath of fresh air to see someone who actually recognizes that pole dance is a DANCE, not a slut show!
kudos to her!!"
Why can't people see that sexy is not the same thing as slutty. I love sexy dancing but I still know when you cross the line and go slutty. Besides there are rules for the competitions abput that dancing or moving in a suggestive manner is nott allowed and competitors are disqualified for that. Alethea and Karol rock every copetition the participate in and never get disqualified becasue they are not dancing slutty.
I guess people who say that are also the same ones that want pole dancing to the olympics wich I am completely against. because it would take away our freedom to dance any way we want. ALOT of sports are not in the olympics and dont even feel the need to be there. Why should we. Well I know many disagree but thats my opinion. I just want those great dancers to be able to be sexy and still being recognized for being one of the best pole dancers.
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I'm not for pole in the Olympics any more either. If it does get into the Olympics, then obviously they are going to strip it as much as possible of it's sensuality which will only fuel the fire between sporty pole dancers and sexy pole dancers. We have to defend it now that it's not slutty. If the sporty version becomes what's poplular and excepted, then any kind of sensual movement will be looked down on and considered "slutty". I'm afraid it's going to destroy the art and move pride in sensual movements and sexuality backwards.
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I saw that same comment, and it seriously ticked me off, especially since they referenced three of my favorite dancers.
You are absolutely right–there is a huge world of difference between slutty and sexy. The style followed by dancers like Leigh Ann and Alethea and Karol is probably not the type of stuff you would even see in most strip clubs–I haven't been inside any, but I have watched video performances of stage shows done by strippers, and it's much different than anything you will see these three do. They do use some of the same floor moves, but overall it's pretty different. Leigh Ann et. al conduct themselves with class–which isn't to say there aren't plenty of strippers with classy dancing styles as well, but I've noticed an increasing amount of complaints on places like Stripperweb about new dancers that are just into really vulgar moves. That seems to be the way stripping is shifting, at least from what I've read, unfortunately–it's not really about the tease anymore, it's about how much farther you can go than the other girl. This is the type of stuff comments like that are referencing, and they are completely off base.
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Oh, and psychoholicslag, I totally agree with you about not having it in the Olympics. It will most likely be stripped of any little miniscule amount of sensuality to make it palatable for the masses, and the whole reason people want it in the Olympics is to mainstream it and make poling acceptable–but it is the pole gymnastics that will become accepted, not styles like that of the BeSpun girls. I absolutely believe it will lead to further dissent between the sexy polers and those who focs solely on the athletic side.
Besides, pole is a form of dance. Nobody is petitioning to get ballet or salsa or ballroom dancing into the Olympics.
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To me, it's not just about sexy dancers getting picked on but any dancer getting picked on. We are still a very small community and without each other we have very few people to defend us, hear us, understand us or support us. No pole dancer should be picking apart or saying hurtful things to or about another pole dancer.
It's okay to NOT like everyone's style. Not every pole dancer is going to appeal to everyone we all like different things but to ridicule anyone is just so wrong.
As Empy would say Empowerment isn't just for paying customers.
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I agree Charley. just because it isn't what floats our boat doesn't mean we should sink their boat.
this was brought home to me in Jamaica by one of the other dancers. Her style is so not what I like. But after having spent the week in her company it was so HER style and fitted her personality so well I had to admire it.
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