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feeling old
Sometimes when I’m dancing, or even thinking of getting into my hotpants, I feel so very old. I’ve always danced through my life, but with it has always been a self-conscious feeling that I look a bit of an idiot doing it. This feeling is getting worse lately (Like what do I think I look like gyrating round a pole?!!) I wonder if anyone else has felt like this, and what helped you get over it? I love the discipline of dancing and how strong I feel on the pole, but this negative stuff just has to stop. Any ideas?
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6 Replies
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I recommend you stop thinking & start feeling. Feel your muscles when you move, freestyle alone at home with no one watching so you can get comfortable.
The body does amazing things if you just let it. Try to only let yourself focus on moving, no judgments allowed.
You dance because you love it, not to please anyone else, right? And the nice side effect of this method is that a dancer who is truly enjoying herself is often the most interesting to watch 🙂 -
Goodness! At 35, you're still totally in your prime! I heard of a lady at the old studio in town who came for a full set of classes… at the age of 85! And she was hot stuff!
What do you think you look like gyrating around a pole? Well, what DO you think you look like? Really! Because I bet you that you look sexy and amazing, and I bet you feel the same.
I feel very self-conscious often. I don't "sexy dance" when people are in the house. I'll do my workout and I'll work on strength moves or other things I'm working on, but I don't really get bump-n-grind sexy until I'm the only one home. I'm very anxious about people… even if they are my boyfriend!
However, getting to the point of doing any kind of sexy was not easy for a while. I didn't feel like I did it well, I didn't think I looked good, I judged myself often (flabby arms, huge hips, thunder thighs, look at that belly…) and it's an issue I continue to have. But, I sort of stopped letting myself say those things when I'm dancing… because, by the end, I feel SO GOOD! It doesn't bother me anymore, because I just had an awesome dance!
And… well, let me put it to you this way: I suck at sexy dancing when it includes actual moves. Steps, little bit of backbends, perhaps a half spin, that's as far as I get.
But, as the boyfriend and I say, sucking at something is the first step to being kinda good at something!
And you're on your way to being a confident, strong, sexy lady. 🙂
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How about checking out some other dancers who are 35+ like Natasha Wang http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDY5GS_HB4k, Shelly Lamb http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Osk1odJbLKQ Our Veena http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXS7N7FbNMQ Shakira lol http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4_yD8RrahE The list goes on with all these ladies still being awesome and still going on strong 🙂
So as far as I'm concerned: 35…hot pants…gyrating BRING IT!!!!!
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Old at 35?? I just started doing pole at 44 and feel more confident and sexy with myself now then before. I've learned if you feel it then others feel it around you – I've always been jealous of those girls that can just own it and don't care what others think – regardless if they look silly – they still own it and I love that. I'm self conscience about it too but learning to relax and enjoy. If you have danced throughout your life then you are probably being more critical to yourself than you need to be. You are in your prime..embrace it….the 40's are fun too…..enjoy!
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↵You need to google Bel Jerimiah at Twirly Girls. I believe she is either in her late 50s or early 60s… and Hotter than most Women in their 20s and 30s.
She is also on FB and Twitter and the loveliest lady in the world. Im sure she wouldn't mind at all if you got in touch…
Even if you still FEEL old, there is no way in hell you can look her up and still think it makes any difference to your poling X
MWAH x
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Omg I just watched a few of her videos and I especially loved ‘bel’s birthday butt’ on you tube. She’s super cool.
I’m learning to pole in Switzerland and a lot of the fun is lost in translation for me. I end up focusing too much on the wrong things.
Anyhow, I’ve had the day to practice a few things (including a bit of sexy dancing) and thanks to all your comments and suggestions, I already feel much better about myself.
You guys are a wise bunch.
Thanks
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