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Beginner pushing 50
Feel a little awkward putting this out there, however after lurking for so long, witnessing the support and comraderie I find myself feeling less intimidated so here I go.
I am pretty new to pole, pushing 50 and not so thin. I LOVE the pole. I go to a different place when I’m dancing, however I find myself getting stuck in my head sometimes with negative self talk; you’re so foolish for this, you’re too old, you’ll never be any good" and then the weight issues "you’re too heavy, you’ll never be able to pull yourself up" etc etc.
Anybody else out there relate?
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20 Replies
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You are not alone…..There are a LOT of ladies the pole and are over 50! There are a bunch on this site….hopefully they will see this and introduce themselves. Anyone can pole dance. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif
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something inside you is drawing you to this art- so you should follow that instinct.
age is just a number & you can do anything you want to if you put your mind to it.my mom is always trying to tell me i’m to old to do certain things- for example: when i was in high
school, she told me i was too old to start pursuing ballet and i WISH I WISH i never listened
to her. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_sad.gif i love to dance and i regret not following my heart.shooot… i may go take a ballet class this week, now that i think about it! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif
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While I’m only pushing 30, I can definitely relate to weight issues. I’ve pretty much decided not to put anymore limitations on myself. With poling, I’ve definitely have exceeded anything I ever imagined I would accomplish. For example, In my first year, I progressed to level 3 of the 5 levels at my studio and I learned how to do the splits for the first time in my life. I would love to be thinner, but I’m definitely physically capable of many moves at this moment, just as I am. The attitude I have now is just to try to act like the person I would like to be and hopefully I will become that person (i.e. if you want to be a person who can do 50 push ups, get down on the floor and try to do 50 push ups). The great thing about the pole is that whatever your current level is, the moves are always fun and sexy. I think that you can look good doing it as a beginner, and then it just gets better. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumright.gif
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If you are on Facebook you really need to add this group:
Grande Dames of Pole Fitness. There is even going to be a contest next year at the Midwest Competition for those 45 and up. There are quite a few of us in our 40’s and up on the site, too!
As a side note, Shelly Lamb who is also a member of Grande Dames just took second place at USPDF West Coast!!
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I started poling three years ago, in my late forties. I’ve always been on the heavy side and have never been athletic. There are some moves that come more easily to me than others, but I don’t care. I LOVE poling and I’ve made progress that I never could have imagined. Absolutely check out Grande Dames of Pole–those ladies are inspiring! You’ve made a very big, very brave step posting this, which tells me you’ve got guts! Thanks for stepping out of the "lurking" shadows! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_sunny.gif
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Happy you are no longer "lurking" and have joined us!! I started when I was 51! My head did the same thing to me…but, I got hooked!! I have gained strength, confidence and a lot of self esteem from poling and I wouldn’t trade it for the world!! I found a beautiful woman inside that I never knew and I took my passion and turned it into a business! A whole new world has opened up to me! SOOOO…I would say to you…GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD AND INTO YOUR BODY and SPIRIT! You will not regret it! I am 54 now, I will be 55 this New Years Eve!! HAPPY POLING…and WELCOME!!! *HUGZ*
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I have also struggled with the things you are. Any of the few close friends I’ve met through this site would tell you, that I struggle with them all the time.
I found pole dancing just over a year ago, and I love it. It makes me feel young and alive, and I have so much fun doing it. I watch my own videos and think I am ridiculous to continue, but unless this site is full of pathological liars (which I doubt), the ladies here do not see the same thing I do. They are great for feedback, and support, and I love having them all in my life. Poling is a journey to self-awareness, and I am learning…slowly but surely.
You are certainly not too old to be poling, and anyone can do it. I wish many of my friends who fight the same age/weight issues that I face(d) would take up poling with me, and learn what I have. I am glad you have found it.
Keep on the path you are following, and lean on all us veeners for support. So glad you stopped your lurking! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumleft.gif
Sarah
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Welcome and glad you have dropped in. I started about 3 years ago at 52. When I went to an intro class for fun I was immediately ‘hooked’. I constantly asked myself (and hubby) what the heck am I doing?!?!? I kept it up and love it. I work at my own level/strength and am doing things I never thought possible. I am not flexible and know I will never be as advanced as others, but I do what I do for me and exercise. We all pole at differenst styles also. I do it for fitness/strength training, even though I play in my own home with sensual/sexy moves, it’s so not me, and that’s okay.
You will find support, encouragement, and fun here at sv. Since I do not attend a studio, this is my pole place to hang out, learn and laugh. Join chat on Friday if you can!! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumright.gif
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hi i’m 51 and started poling aged 49. now i am TEACHING pole at the studio i go to so don’t lurk get out there and take pride in what you are doing and ENJOY. 50 IS A NUMBER NOT A TIME LIMIT. welcome to the world of pole xx
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Pink-
I think we all have some level of self-doubt at some point in life. When that little voice tries to plant those seeds let OUR voices be heard instead! My friend Jennifer of PoleSkivvies once said, "Get out of your head and dance with your heart." and I think truer words were never spoken! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. I have met the most amazing women on my own pole journey, and am a better person because of ALL of them. Welcome!!!
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If you are on Facebook you really need to add this group:
Grande Dames of Pole Fitness.
omgosh, Thank you for this link.
And thank you to everyone else for all the support. I’ve only started to read some of the replies so I may be back to edit/add on. But as of right now I’m so happy I took the risk, came out of lurking and posted my honest feelings.
xo
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Hello…there are a lot of us here over 40’s – i am 42…anyhow i have felt as you – lots have. Isn’t it crazy how it’s really easy to get down on ourselves but really hard to give ourselves a much needed break https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif
I think it really hit me when someone told be to just dance…for me, not for a man or a competition or to push myself to learn the latest greatest trick but to just have fun…
Here is a post I wrote years ago on another forum but it really helped me and a lot of other women…hopefully you will get something from it as well https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif
* and by the way for the record I go back and forth between a size 8-12 at any given moment so I understand https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif
"I have noticed a lot of posts lately regarding weight, feeling sexy, and having a love hate relationship with the pole…so here are my feelings on the whole thing…
First of all please know I am not a small girl…I hang around a size 10-12 although I have moments of being a size 8…in my mind I want to be an 8 but…my body really doesn’t want to go there so why fight it! I have T & A and they are not going anywhere – plus I LOVE THEM!!! Outside of the fact that I can’t seem to kick the last 2-3 cigs a day I am very healthy LOL
So as far as weight goes, let’s be honest it does effect certain moves, but so many things do!!! Height (for example with the layout (CAR/CKR) certain variations of it are easier if you are taller. If you do the foot hook it is MUCH harder if you have short legs LOL the thigh cross is easier – my teacher pointed that one out to me THANKS for all the short girls) chest size (girls with bigger chests when coming out of a snake dive ( inverted crucifix)on the floor can literally get caught on the chest if they are pouncing down- trust me I know LOL). Hair length…try crawling and accidentally getting caught on your hair (talk to Jenny ) OUCH, flexibility – well you get the point…I could go on forever. There are always modifications of moves that you can talk to your teacher about as well.
The point is we all have issues and while I will admit to thinking from time to time "hmmm if I lost 10 more pounds that move would be easier" I also recognize things that my 10-12 size body can do that others can’t. I have Popeye arms…which I hate LOL I did gymnastics for years and get very bulky muscles quick…I would LOVE to have a long lean look but with my height and body structure it wouldn’t matter how much I lost…I have and will always be compact LOL…but I have really strong arms…I can climb with ease. I have big thighs – again not loving that but they do posses a Vulcan Death Grip If they were smaller I would not be able to do a lot of what I can. Pick something about YOU that YOU love and focus on that…it might be the curve of your neck or as simple as a flip of your hair…or your smile…we all have at least ONE thing about us that we love…we ought to have more!
What I’m trying to say is that EVERYBODY TYPE has something beautiful and perfect about it. Smaller, Larger, Short, Tall we all have something magical and perfect about us. There was one girl from one of my classes who NEVER touched the pole and had a body to KILL for – she ALWAYS mesmerized us in class…one dance – seriously the whole class was SILENT when she danced…on the way out she seemed down and said "V why did nobody cheer when I danced like the rest- it’s because I do no pole tricks right?" I said "NOOOOOOOO IT’S BECAUSE WE ARE SPEECHLESS!!!! YOU ARE THE MOST FLUID DANCER I HAVE EVER SEEN…YOUR HIPS DO THINGS I DIDN’T THINK POSSIBLE – WE ARE ALL IN AWE".
It was at THAT moment I realized…larger, small, tall or short we all seem to be WAY TOO HARD on ourselves and we all have our hang ups.
And there are things we can all do to improve our dance/pole work…pole ups (GOD I hate those). AB work…blech – but it helps LOL…and of course my nemesis – working on our flexibility. But I think the number one thing that improved my dance or my feelings towards my dance was just not giving a rat’s as* anymore about if my stomach looked larger in that outfit or if my thighs look too big…once you let go of those inhibitions your emotions and dance will have the ability to flow freely.
blah blah blah so many words! I am tired…enjoy https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif"
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What a great thread – welcome, Pink! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif
And Veruca – THANK YOU. I needed to hear every word that you put out there tonight. I struggle a lot with just feeling self conscious and lacking confidence in myself sometimes and really needed your post. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_queen.gif
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I am 41 and have bounced through the same sizes as Veruca. I have been 25 lbs heavier than I am now and was even 15 lbs heavier the beginning of this year. What she posted years ago on the other forum is just as true today. I am going into year 3 of poling and there are still so many things that I can’t do nor probably ever will be able to do, but I am constantly amazed at the things that I have gotten this body TO DO. I will never be as good as any of the people who are competing but it does not matter to me. This past weekend at a party I was able to pole and the look on my hubby’s face when I was done almost put tears in my eyes. Those few moments when you are lost to the world and it is just you, the pole and the music…THAT is what continually draws me to pole and to push myself.
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how do ms Pink ! 52 here, and love pole so much my best buddy and i opened our own studio, which has been nothing but a blessing and a joy !
there are many, many things the ‘mature’ pole dance student is able to accomplish, so don’t let any pre-conceived notions of ‘woulda/shouda/coulda’ stand in your way….
regarding body image… hey — without a doubt things are different now than they were, but make sure you take a really good look around. you will see all shapes, sizes and ages poling, and doing a damn fine job of it too. this is YOUR journey, and so long as you are happy that’s all that really matters.
so nice you are no longer lurking ! xxoo
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