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Bringing Sexy back…
I’ve been hesitant to write about it and Im not a prude by any means but smth really bothered me yesterday at the club. I went out to a Valentine 50 shades bash and this club is not a stripers joint where girls perform and get paid but just a club that has poles for dancing with a very small area to perform. I’ve been enjoying coming to this club for regular dancing and may be twice a night I would go to do my pole. No pressure of course, no competition just going with the flow free-styling combining dance moves with tricks and enjoying myself. Not much opportunity for floor work as there is none around the pole just a small squire above the stairs. Sometimes I practice there new moves that I just learned at a studio and because there is an audience I try to perform them better and smoother then my regular learning time. So its a lot of fun associated with this place for me and also I meet other polers of different levels and socialize a bit.
Yesterday was a contest though … DJ asked “ladies on a pole” to take off as many pieces of clothing as they can… So I dont want to be judgemental here but when Im poling I usually wear my poling outfits which probably by some will be judged revealing enough and I never would take them off but many polers did…. take everything off….. and one lady of a respectful age was giving a pole presentation of purely gynaecological content. She was very comfortable with what she was doing. I mean all the poses butterfly and V’s and teddy’s and a lunch box. At some point I think I was about to see her fallopian tubes displayed for public view. Im sorry, not trying to be sarcastic and understand she is celebrating her body, her nudity and the women’s power. I get it all… And Dj announced her as a winner but she still continued to perform in a nude for 2 more songs. And younger crowd started to shy away and I felt extremely embarrassed watching it and sorry for her, really sorry… I left the club shortly with a mixed filling inside.
I remember one of the guys saying: “This is sexy” and I don’t think so. Am I wrong? And what is sexy then?… The less is more rules for me in this case. Also when we hit a certain age and our bodies are in a such a great shape do we really have to sick public appraisal and display all we have in a such a vulgar way?
I don’t want to do Teddy anymore it’s killed for me 🙁
Sorry if I wrote something inappropriate or rude. -
20 Replies
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My question I guess would be why her nudity upset you so much? She was obviously okay with it as well as other people in the audience.
As for your question about what is sexy, there have been numerous threads on here asking that exact same question and the answers are as varied as we are. Different people find different things sexy. For some the naked female form is sexy, to others it is more of a mind play and other still it is a shape or look or attitude. This is why strip clubs have women that look different, not everyone has the same thing that turns them on.
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@zoilife6233 I get what you’re saying. It’s hard to say without having been there witnessing it myself whether this woman stripped down because she was “celebrating her body” or if she felt like she had to perform in such a revealing way because she has been conditioned to think that is what men like.
You have every right to your mixed feelings, but don’t let it affect the way you think of yourself doing the same moves.
As far as what is sexy, I also go for the less-is-more route, but to each his or her own.
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Chemgoddess
it’s not a strip club and she is not a stripper just a very athletic 57 old lady with a need of showing her genitalia. It was not very ecstatically pleasant number to watch for quite a few people there. Young people shied and moved away from that pole.
Its like you are at the lecture and prof that you like during that lecture does something inappropriate that you totally lose the interest to a subject
Or may be you right if she is ok with it we all should embrace it and celebrate it…. may be I left too soon? -
She might be ok with it, but that doesn’t mean that others are obligated to watch.
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Hey there!
So, it sounds like you felt really uncomfortable with someone being overtly sexual, and perhaps showing their lady-bits to a larger group. It also sounds like you’re pretty uncomfortable with someone doing this who is no longer a “young woman,” regardless of athleticism or physical skill.Now, I’m going to say that YOUR opinion of these things is entirely YOURS. What you find aesthetically pleasing or not, or sexy or not, is entirely within your own world and your own mind. You may enjoy looking at muscular men, but not at women’s feet, for example. You may like men to have short hair, rather than long hair. A particular nose type, a smell, a turn of the hand- all of these things can either be pleasing or not, but they are NOT, and NEVER will be pleasing to ALL people. Not even the majority of people.
Personally, I think women are beautiful, fascinating and majestic creatures- I just got back from seeing a Valentine’s Burlesque show, which was full of women of various ages, sizes and body types (as well as movement styles and personality types), all doing beautiful, funny, engaging and artistic strip shows. And yes, they were STRIP shows, down to panties and pasties, usually. I loved it. I always do.
However, one line I do prefer to draw is at the lady-bits. I don’t really want to see what’s between a woman’s legs- personally, I feel uncomfortable with it. This is my own preference, my own issue, and that’s where it stays.
Other people do, in fact, enjoy seeing that. For them, it’s the hottest thing they’ve ever seen, or even just kinda hot, or even just interesting.
The fact that this 57 year old woman you’ve been describing was comfortable in herself enough to be able to strip fully down, for fun, is wonderful. She clearly felt safe, strong, and beautiful. That can be something to celebrate.
YOU may not have enjoyed seeing some parts of her body, but that does not mean that other people did not.
Also, I would point out that our society has a very strong stigma against anyone over the age of 30 being in any way overtly sexual. This is super unfortunate, and I think that people even well into their 60’s can be beautiful, sexy, and powerful. I do not necessarily think that they need to strip, and do not necessarily think they need to refrain from it. It’s up to them, and them alone, to determine the style of sexuality they would like to display, if they would like to do so at all.As for your particular situation, I think that the question of “what is sexy” is one that only you can answer, because the question is really “What do YOU find sexy?” Personally, I don’t like the wavy-legs done in an open V, but not because I find it gross- I just find it weird. Other things that some people do that are not intended to be sexy can, to me, be very sexy! It’s all about the individual looking, and their opinion of what they like.
Also… what did you think the Teddy pose was actually intended for? I mean, pole dancing evolved, in many ways, in the strip club. A hold where the usual leg position is open V, and pointed toward the audience is pretty loud and proud about those lady-bits! It doesn’t HAVE to be done in that way, though. Do it your way, and others will do it their way.
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It might not have been a strip club but the DJ encouraged the contestants to take off their clothes and then declared her the winner after her performance and although she continued on once the contest was over management of the venue didn’t ask her to stop. so it doesn’t seem like she broke any rules.
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I didnt even know it was legal to strip in a public place that is not a strip club. in california you have to have licensing to strip and sometimes the clubs are not allowed to sell alcohol depending on the level of nudity. if this is a place where nudity just doesnt happen, then that’s just weird to me. If I was enjoying myself at a regular non-strip club-then I dont want to see some woman’s pussy. damn, there’s a time and a place for that. I dont even care about her age. Or if it was a man that was nude. that just seems inappropriate to get nude in a regular club.
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And I would be worried about vagina juice getting on the pole.
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Actually that’s a really good point, Phoenix! Here in Canada it’s actually crazy-difficult to get licencing for a show or venue to allow nudity, and there are some really strict regulations around it.
It would be a HUGE risk for that venue to just have nudity for one night without proper licensing. -
yes, there’s alot of legal issues with that. And getting a crowd all worked up and telling women to strip without planning out security ahead of time can be asking for disaster. that’s putting those women in danger all because some douchebag DJ was having some fun.
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damn looks like i missed the party
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I personally have been arrested for public indecency at a closed private invite only party at a bar and I was not even naked. The laws are very very messed up and it all depends on if the facility is already being watched or has complaints. In Ohio I can be arrested for dirty dancing with my husband if what I am doing “affronts” another person in the bar. Basically the city did not like the owner of the bar and did what they could to take his liquor license. I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. What did I do? I pretty much lap danced a female friend of mine on top of the pool table.
That said, this is more of an exploration of your own feelings on sexuality and the naked body than anything else. For her it may have been a freedom of expression or hell, even a statement of announcing to the world that even at her age she is still sexy. I find no issues with what happened but that is because of my own personal views on things like this.
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Isn’t it fair to say, though, that someone can have no hangups about nudity but doesn’t necessarily want to see a stranger’s crotch spread-eagle in front of her face?
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From what I read in the first post (and excuse me if I mis-interpreted it) but she was more upset about her total nudity and saw it as vulgar and now she will not perform a move because of what she saw. Those are her own feelings (which she is completely entitled to), just as my feelings of not seeing the situation the same are completely valid.
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sexy is different things to different people. dont let her nudity ruin the teddy move for you.
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