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Considering Working in a Strip Club
SeienDesuYo replied 9 years, 8 months ago 17 Members · 33 Replies
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Eh. I do know I have significant issues that I’m starting to believe are irreversible from stripping. I understand you are being touched and what not already but stripping is so much worse! And the touching bothered me a little but it was more so what men tell you, what they compare you to, the evil things they say about your body. There’s a lot to stripping that people can’t see unless you go through it yourself! I do know it destroyed many close relationships I had, I managed to keep boyfriends but it always ended up a problem sooner or later, dealing with horrible two faced women… It’s just not worth it I don’t think unless you literally have nothing left and it’s the last resort. I’m not trying to be mean at all!!! Please, please don’t it that way 🙂 or like I’m trying to make things worse. I do know though that the money is the main reason I stayed for so long. Once you get a taste of that much money, it’s HARD to adjust back to normal life whenever that rolls around. I think if it’s something you want to try out, go for it! But just make sure in your heart it’s what you want to do 🙂 my life is perfect as of now but if shit came crashing down and something happened between my husband and I, you better believe my bootay would go right back to it. I do give it that, it’s a good back up!
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Your thought of “I get objectified anyway, might as well get paid for it” makes complete sense to me and is actually a part of why I work as a stripper myself. I second the warnings about alcohol and other substances – I can confidently say I’m one of the only dancers at my club who doesn’t drink on the job, and I get offered drinks all the time, telling them I’m underage doesn’t deter them from offering to slip me a shot or part of their beer. Whatever your boundaries are, you have to keep them rock-solid, with substances and touch alike, because people will push them.
I feel like you know all that, though, so I would rather warn you about other dancers. As PolieOlie mentioned, there are so many horrible two-faced women that you will be working with. I have been sexually assaulted by other dancers multiple times throughout my time as a stripper. I received a rape threat from another dancer at the first club I worked at. The woman then followed me to the next club I worked at, and there she would do creepy shit like follow me into the dressing room when it was likely to be empty. I left that club because of her, and I am *extremely* lucky to know at least one manager at my current club who actually takes dancer-dancer assault seriously, but I know not every manager does, because I know one other manager who basically gave me a blank stare when I tried to report a dancer who just approached me and grabbed my breasts.
I’m focusing on sexual assault here because that is NEVER talked about, I am literally the only person I know who has ever discussed this issue. I’ve also heard screaming matches in the dressing room, but I feel like that kind of thing is talked about at least a little bit. I know your biggest problem so far has been unwanted touch from men, and I empathize with that very strongly. If you do decide to try working as a stripper, don’t expect the women at the club to be any different (including customers, female customers are often worse than the men when it comes to unwanted touch).
I would also reccomend working at a big club in a big city if that’s possible for you. That way you can utilize your pole skills, get good stage money for that, and therefore spend less time one-on-one with customers, which puts you at greater risk of being touched/grabbed/assaulted.
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Hi! Ex Stripper here. I’m going to be brutally honest about my time dancing. Remember that not every experience will be the same, but from what I’ve heard, I’m not unique in any way.
I don’t regret my time as a dancer. Honestly I felt less sexually objectified while dancing then I do just walking down the street some days. Most of my time dancing was ridiculously fun and exactly like you probably imagine. Men love anything with tits, really. If you can smile and flirt you can make money. Just make them feel special and fun. Most days I felt powerful and sexy. Most of the time I had more money than I knew what to do with (but not always! Remember that you don’t get paid a paycheck, you pay to work – you make what you can sell, and you’re selling yourself).
There are aspects of this job that can really rip you (anyone) into shreds, and you need to seriously consider that. The first day I ever worked, I sold a VIP room to a man who proceeded to try to bully me into sleeping with him (first of many!), and then tried (very brazenly) to stick his fingers in my vagina. He succeeded, by the way. I continued dancing, but it takes something from you. Men will try this every single day you work. I’ve had men pull out their parts while my back was turned, I’ve had men put my nipples IN THERE MOUTHS without so much as a by-your-leave (they seriously tried to do this all the time! GROSS). You will get asked every day for sexual favors, and some are more brazen about it than others. You will get men who grab you without your permission, guaranteed. Men (and women) who treat you like you are NOTHING, dancers included. You can tell management and yes, they will get kicked out, but does that do you any good after it’s happened? Just some things to consider!
Everything that PolieOlie and BabyDragon mentioned is completely right, and it’s solid advice so I won’t go back over it. Except I will say that I’ve kept serious relationships while stripping (we’re still together), and if you are honest with each other it doesn’t have to impede your relationship. I also lost friends over it. It happens. I will leave you with this: if you decide to dance, please don’t do it because you think that you have no other choice. Men can smell this on you – you can’t be vulnerable and be a successful dancer, I firmly believe this. If you want to dance, then do it! I’d go back, still, even with all the crap that can go along with it. But first you need to make sure you take care of yourself mentally and know your boundaries. What will you do for money? You have to seriously ask yourself this question. Know your limits before you start, and stick to them, because when someone tries to push them you need to be strong.
Hope this helps a bit.
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