-
Discussion Title…
Starting to think this new dance troupe isn't for me. I'm just not fitting in well, it feels like a clique I'm not in… I really really wanted to do it. I love to perform. I even like the music. But they keep changing their minds, practices are friday nights from 8-10, I just got an email that they are extending the hours this Friday because half the troupe didn't show up to last rehearsal. The choreographer decided on black white and red as our theme, and there is already a troupe and their theatre thats themed that way locally, I feel as though its a very bad decision. It seems everyone else gives input and its well received, I offer an alternative or suggestion, I get the stink eye. So now I'm just afraid to voice my opinion and that fear made me feel like maybe I should just bow out early and let them go do their thing. Its just the only studio/troupe around that isn't a cheer type squad, which, I can not join because I am not considered the proper body type. The other troupe I could have involvement with but I live 2 hrs from where they practice and often further from the performances. I'm just torn. Should I go Friday and make my decision after? Should I just let the choreographer know I am not feeling valued or included? We are not paid, and not even offered anything like, say, a free class or open studio time for the effort. I didn't have a problem with that if it was a collaborative thing, but it seems they're being demanding, its a good showcase for the studio, I'm working my butt off, and not even getting the fulfillment of camaraderie with other dancers, basic respect… Half the dancers work at the studio so already have relationships formed. I DO like the dance and want to perform. I just don't know if that like is worth all the hassle and rejection and being ordered around like I AM being paid….. ugh… sigh….
-
8 Replies
-
Hmmm. That is a tough one. One thing I do know, typically breaking into a troupe can be hard to do, especially initially, and most especially if all the others started at the same time themselves. There tends to be a certain amount of protectiveness of the group (concept, style, skills, etc) involved because often there is a lot of blood sweat and tears involved with getting a performance troupe off the ground. Its hard to strike a balance between people who are friends and in it up to their elbows with someone who has just come in. Often a newbie can be seen as a complication (definitely a vocal newbie) to the group dynamic. It sucks, but can be common in group dynamics for all groups everywhere. Often it's just power plays within the group. And when people aren't paid for their efforts, things become personal because its hard to let go. If you aren't getting paid money, many people are not willing to let go of recognition, decision making, etc, or whatever else they see as the benefit for doing this in the first place. Because if it it isnt for money, it has to be for something else.
Basically, it will just take time. And you will be the bottom of the totem pole until you prove you are a valuable asset. Being a valuable asset will mean showing up on time, doing what is asked of you 110%, stepping up when asked and often sadly, keeping your mouth shut at the right times. All of this takes time and its about gaining trust. It probably took a long time for the current group to trust each other artistically. What you have to decide is whether you are willing to put in this time, and will it be worth it to you? Its likely that being the new person in a troupe will have a lot of the same qualities in varying degrees no matter where you go. However, if dealing with your current situation makes you feel bad about yourself, or completely takes the joy out why you do it, I would suggest reconsidering. Seems like your options are limited though, so working hard for this one might be the best? Only you know that. 🙂
-
Well the group was formed with the current members, including me. Not breaking into it, we’re building it. So that dynamic I understand but that is not the case here. The instructors know each other but we ALL just started this. If they feel I’m a complication or a vocal newbie, I’m definitely in the wrong spot. I just emailed the choreographer, telling her I’m not sure its a good fit, did she have an opinion either way, and that I may bow out after tomorrows rehearsa depending on how it goes. I can guage more acurately based on her response I think.
-
And I feel I have held my tongue plenty, but it was time to say what I needed to say. I mean, the debut performance is end of april. I show up earlier than anyone and usually the instructor hasn’t unlocked the door yet. I practice hard. When we videoed ourselves 5 girls sat out feeling they didn’t know the choreography, but you video to learn! What’s sitting out gonna do? Maybe I feel I’m bottom of the totem pole to the instructors who are in the studio’s troupe, and I don’t want to be advertisement for a studio that looks down on me. Half the girls weret at our last (aka,3rd) rehearsal. Maybe I feel like I’m putting in a lot of blood sweat and tears to build this with and for them and they just…aren’t that nice to me. So the friendship, performing, collaboration is what my motives were for joining. I guess I pretty much know what I wanna do. I just haven’t made the decision to cut the cord final yet because I want to talk to the choreographer first. The situation blows.
-
Ah I see. Sorry I was so off base. I never meant to insinuate that you were not doing those things (working hard, showing up, etc), as I obviously am not there and would never know your situation, I was just drawing from my experiences with what I have had to do in the past.
I have been a part of breaking into a group and subsequently with building one, and these experiences have both been hard. Different ways though. I love performing so I stuck it out, and it was good for me overall. But there have been moments where I think everyone wanted to kill someone else. But everyone's situation is different. And it's important to feel like you can say what's on your mind. That should never be devalued, especially since you are all starting it together to get this off the ground. Is the choreographer the director of the group? Who is the go to person?
-
Studio owner scheduled auditions. Choreographer is the “leader” it seems. Others are either instuctors or advanced students. I’m a lower level pole, but I’m a hooper, and have a hoop act to add to the troupe. When I tried just joining post practice chat about the movie burlesque, I said I didn’t like the movie, but I liked the music and dancing, even though it was more cabaret than burly. Choreogrpher rolled her eyes at me and said burly dancers were all panty bunched about it being “incorrectly titled” I just commented. And as it goes, follow the leader. Choreographer rolls her eyes, the other girls know where she stands, they adopt her stance to remain in good favor. One girl agreed with me that only the feather/pearl act was burly but it wasn’t even an argument, I just commented, but most was discssion of cool techniques and inspirations from the movie. I mentioned cell block tango to switch it to where I wasn’t feeling under attack anymoe cuz we all agreed on that. It all just left a bad feeling.
-
Haha Well they couldn't very well call it Cabaret, now could they? I have spent time watching the burlesque vs cabaret/neo burlesque debate. It would be cool if some people stopped worrying about labels and worried more about creating cool stuff. But so often one side gets vilified and DRAMA! ugh. I hate drama.
Sounds like a group that panders. A lot. When someone's vision is never challenged (in a positive collaborative way), bad things happen. Things get stale, etc. People do things that don't look good, but no one has the balls to say it. Sounds like the choreographer has been given free rein and the others knowing this have decided to do what it takes to get on her good side. Sounds like a situation that will never be drama-free. Or even remotely close, which is all any one can hope for anyway, I guess.
-
Forgot to mention… I totally get why burlesquers are completely irritated by people dressing in fringe and lace not actually… burlesquing, but still calling it that. Burlesque includes striptease. Dita Von Teese Forever! <3 <3 <3
-
Well, I don't really care about that stupid debate lol, I just commented to it since it comes up with the movie. It was STILL a bad movie with the exception of the musical/dance aspects. If it had been a storyline with no entertainment, the acting alone would've had people crying of boredom. I didn't say any of this though. I simply said "Well, its not really burlesque, its more cabaret, but thats what we're doing here so its good, but I really didn't like the movie." Thats when the eye rolls came in and the choreographer declared it her favorite movie ever, a few others declared the same, and everyone acted like I was a high and mighty burlesquer or something. I barely do it! Is HOOPLESQUE even Burly? I dunno. Burlesquers would probably say I am a hoop stripper. Its silliness. I didn't feel it warrented their response. I was pleasant, polite, friendly. Not always the most approachable, I admit, but I'm very shy, and I KNOW it can come off as cold to others who haven't known me long or well. Working on it as we speak.
Your second paragraph is SPOT ON!!!! Thats why I'm thinking more and more as today goes on, maybe I don't want to build this with that group particularly. Its really nice just to sort out my thoughts with someone who is NOT my husband who basically said "f those b's, quit." Its not that easy when I had such high hopes for an awesome thing. And after just 3 rehearsals, it IS hard to guage, but when its gotten off to such a shoddy start, I'm disheartened. I value your imput greatly.
Log in to reply.