StudioVeena.com Forums Discussions Husband wants to take me to a strip club

  • Rara

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 2:33 am

    I Have been on the inside of strip club plenty of times, but not as a dancer. My ex-boyfriend was a bouncer at a place in PA close to NJ, so not a good area either. I went with him to work , Knowing it was a topless place. I wanted to see what goes on there. Thinking It was kind of trashy and I would see the dancers flirting with him and so forth. I can tell you I was wrong. I would sit there from 7pm until 2am and watch theses girls dance. It wanst what I expected. Alot of the girl there , where really nice and very talented. I got to know alot of the dancers and I cant say not one never through there self off as slutty. After talking with these girls , they would tell you that they are there for the job, they would play the part to get the tips. I remember two girls that would never strip off there top, and they were the two girls that where the favorites of the place and got the most tips. One of these girls was and Attoney and did dancing on the side for extra cash.
    I did enjoy going to see these girls dance, I wasnt into what they were wearing or not wearing, but into watching there routines. Its because of that experince of going to that strip club is why and I learning to pole dance. Not because of the exotic side , its the art of pole dance and how beautiful one can make it look. So in my opinon you can learn alot from going there and picking up pointers. You would just have to prepare yourself to see some of these girls half dressed. I somehow blocked it out, so it wasnt a problem for me. I hoped I helped.

  • MissMayy

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 2:34 am

    You never know until you go! I was pleasantly surprised the first time I went to a strip club, and jealous of the moves those girls can do. Maybe the idea of going with your husband is what’s holding you back, try going with some girlfriends first. I didn’t get a ‘private show’ until like the 4th or 5th time I went, personally I just prefer watching the girls on the stage.

  • Foxy_Rei

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 2:35 am
  • Rara

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 2:41 am

    If you decide to do it let me know. Keep in mind if you dont like it , you can always walk out and leave.

  • Veena

    Administrator
    April 6, 2009 at 4:36 am

    Well where to begin? Hmmmm I have been to strip clubs many times! I still go, I usually end up having some fun conversations with the girls. The only reason I agreed to go the first time was because I was really interested in the pole work. This was before I had even tried a pole. I was fascinated by it, I don’t know why but… That’s how I learned to move. I have always gone with my husband and it was fun because we felt like we were doing something naughty… but together…hehe.
    So here is my thoughts on this. All men, https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_bigsmurf.gif happily married or not like to look at naked or scantily clad women, https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_smurfin.gif that’s just the way their simple pea sized brains work. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_geek.gif So if you go…. yes he will drool over all the girls in the club BUT that doesn’t me he thinks they are more attractive than you or will love you less. My husband and I became closer after our experiences, because it helped start up some interesting and honest conversations. I also realized he wasn’t feeding me a line when he said he preferred small boobies (I call mine "hootlits" not hooters.) We have been happily married for 13yrs! Honest communication is the key.
    Now if you do decide to go…do your research, we went to a full nude club the first time https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif I didn’t realize it double https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_surprised.gif . until I looked at the girl on stage. I was super uncomfortable but to my surprise the girls were really nice. In my experience women guest are treated really well in the clubs. I have gotten a private dance and the girl and I end up talking about clothes and hair silly things, and your man has no clue and thinks its super hot, because all he see’s is two girls! If you tell the dancer your not really comfortable she’ll be nice. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_flower.gif
    Just make sure that there’s an understanding between you and your husband….if your uncomfortable and want to leave he doesn’t get upset or make you feel bad. If you say enough, then it’s done!! If he’s not willing to give you that kind of control over the situation then don’t go! Talk about it before during and after…don’t pester him but just remember this is how most men think…"I wanna beer an I wanna see somthin necked" https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif You can learn a lot from the girls in the club, the girls who do the best TEND to be the ones that are the most confident, regardless of their shape or size. Learn to work it girl. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_flower.gif

  • Foxy_Rei

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 9:35 am

    LOL Veena I love the Jeff Foxworthy quote… https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_razz.gif

  • lily

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 1:11 pm

    I LOVE to party at strip clubs! I don’t get to go near as often as I’d like……usually because I get so wheels off and I end up spending way too much of my husband’s money https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif You should really go Jaq, they really aren’t quite what you think, and if you’re sweet and friendly to the dancer’s they’ll love it and be totally sweet to you back. Haha, I ususally leave with girl’s numbers to get our kids together for playdates, it always annoys my hubby’s friends https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif

  • glitterhips

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 2:37 pm

    LOL Lily I can totally imagine you picking up strippers numbers! That is too funny.

    My ex loooooooved going to strip clubs and I went with him twice…I did have fun but as everyone knows here I am pretty self conscious about my body so I was definitely concerned he’d find some of the girls hotter than I am, or to have better bodies, etc. I also definitely wasnt comfortable with seeing naked women sit on his lap or flirt with him…but to my surprise the girls were paying more attention to me! We got a lap dance and it was mostly me getting a lap dance while he watched…I don’t think he was expecting me to get all the attention and I think it actually pissed him off a little https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_tongue.gif

    But, I will agree with everyone here strip clubs can be fun. If you’re cool with the dancers theyre very friendly.

    I dont mean to offend any dancers here but at the clubs I’ve gone to I’ve only seen two or three dancers who can use the pole and they really only did some basic inverts and spins…nothing death defying like our Neke does https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif I think your husband saying he wants to go so you can get "pole tips" might just be a way to get you to be okay with going…but if my man was going to a club I’d prefer he went with me than without me!

    Thats my .2..like Veena said, discuss your limits with him before hand so he’s not surprised when you don’t want a girl to spread her legs in front of you so can see her up to her kidneys. I think it’s worth a go just to say you went, who knows you might end up really enjoying it!

  • pole-twista

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 3:11 pm

    bottom line is if your doing it bc you want to, your curious or whatever great https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumright.gif but dont be talked into something you truly dont feel comfortable w https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumbdown.gif theres a diffrence between leaving your comfort zone to grow and doing something that doesnt sit right w you to make someone else happy i personally dont want my bf at a strip club https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_ncool.gif i am more adament about this now than ever as i have 2 poles in my house the way i feel personally is i am not cool w MY man goin to pay other women to take there cloths off https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_evil.gif um.. hello.. your gf is here w a pole/clothes/shoes/moves ect why do you need to go pay a stranger?? i dont want to hear about entertainment or getting out of the house or anyrthing to that effect you want to get out/socialize/drink? go to a bar or another event w friends , come home, and get a private show from the woman you love in the privacy of our home https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_king.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_queen.gif would he be cool w me getting on stage for a bunch of men taking my clothes off and throwing money at me all while i smile and gyrate my crotch into the floor .. um no he knows i want to do a pole contest but he also knows theres no way in hell i would be removing my top/getting naked/wearing a gstring ( not thats theres anything wrong w that but i know he feels like i do and would feel disrespected) i am saying this is how I feel about MY relationship for others it may be a great time for me no i didnt spend $$ on outfits ect to have him go invest his time/sexual energy on some strange women hell no https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_puke_l.gif i have been to the clubs and i know some peeps are probably going to get upset, but it does depend on the club girls are not always nice sometimes they are actually meaner to the ladies! ( i had a girl who would only come to the part of the stage where me and my girl were uhnless we started showing $$ and than would come over like she was all aggravated and actually gave us a dirty look!! i was like dont be mad at us bc your up there when you obviously dont want to be ) some are i had 1 girl who was super nice! she was like someone i wanted to say " hey go get dressed and lets go grub and gab " i am not saying this to scare you off the subject https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_shaking.gif you asked for opinions and i am giving you my true feelings not some candy coated assurance some clubs the women take care of themselves, they are enetertaining ( even to the point i may go see a show w my guy as its an actual show, but not topless/naked that would never happen to me thats very disrespectful ) and make the peopel (including women ) feel comfortable its easy to enjoy a great performance in a clean upscale club i personally dont know of any in my area as i said 1 is very well known by a name i wont use here its known for the drug trafficking, run down women and girls who look 14 its just sad basically i would say if you plan on going make sure your doing it for the right reasons, decide the do’s and don’ts before you walk in to lessen chance of bad experience, and go w a girlfriend or 2 first to see how you feel during and after hope this helped and didnt mean to offend anyone just giving my honest feelings hope it works out for you https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_sunny.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_flower.gif

  • Foxy_Rei

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 7:27 pm
  • RoxyPink

    Member
    April 6, 2009 at 8:47 pm

    I LOVE this thread…except for me it’s the complete opposite. I love strip clubs and have been trying to talk my husband into us going to one together. I haven’t been to one since before he and I got together (almost 5 yrs now) He is the one that is a little uneasy about it! He said that he would feel like he was disrespecting me by looking at other girls when I’m right there….I say what’s the difference if I’m there or not??? So any tips on getting him to go with me?? https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif

  • Foxy_Rei

    Member
    April 7, 2009 at 1:39 am
  • lily

    Member
    April 7, 2009 at 1:55 am

    I LOVE this thread…except for me it’s the complete opposite. I love strip clubs and have been trying to talk my husband into us going to one together. I haven’t been to one since before he and I got together (almost 5 yrs now) He is the one that is a little uneasy about it! He said that he would feel like he was disrespecting me by looking at other girls when I’m right there….I say what’s the difference if I’m there or not??? So any tips on getting him to go with me?? https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif

    heee!! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif My husband is a little funny about it too, before we met he used to love them and dated (I use that term loosely) a few dancers and yeah he’ll still go with his friends for the random ‘guy’s night’ or whatever, but he’s not so much into it when I’m there……. He totally won’t get dances if I’m there (unless it’s one together https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif ) I think the real reason he hates them is because of how $$$ they are – these girls are there to make money – Jacq if you go be prepared to pay them right! And regarding some of the points Pole-Twista made, I’ve definitely encountered the irritated stripper unhappy to see other chicks in the club. Personally I think it’s easier to go with a guy, or a few guys. If you’re nervous, just relax and be a wallflower – the girls will probably ignore you for a while and treat the guys like normal and it’s really interesting to watch the whole thing. A group of pretty girls can be intimidating – ugh, I’ve been out with chicks who acted all snotty and it was awful- of course the dancers hated us. So be chill, and just be nice.

    I have to say I do think it sounds like you husband is turned on by your pole-dancing in general and that’s his motivation! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_twisted.gif IDK – I’d say to just keep open communication with him, for sure don’t do anything you don’t feel right about https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_queen.gif

  • untamedshrew

    Member
    April 10, 2009 at 11:47 pm

    OMG! I used to totally HATE strip clubs. My first husband would go once every year or two and I would refuse to touch him for a week because it felt like cheating. I am a feminist and felt it was so degrading to women. Then somehow my opinion started to transform. I thought the men are being exploited just as much as if not more than the women. These ladies are able to extract huge cash for playing a fantasy! So somehow my current hubby convinced me to take him to a club for his birthday. I was really shy and couldn’t even look up at first. Then I looked up and saw that it wasn’t nearly as "sleazy" as I had expected! I started tipping based on athletic ability and had a great time. Next birthday, I was excited to go and "check out some moves". My husband sneak attacked me with a lapdance, and I kinda even enjoyed it (don’t tell him- he thinks I was doing him a favor!!) It beat having her grope my husband! You know, before I went to a club, I would have been worrying what my husband was up to there. Now I know and it’s not as bad as I thought! He stares at some T&A and hands out cash to any girl that gets close to him. Men really are so simple (to quote Saschapoles). My husband gets mad when I talk to the girls because it makes them "real people" and spoils his fantasy! LOL! Best of all, going to the club adds naughtiness to our marriage- it’s just good clean fun! And of course it lead to me getting my own pole. Plus, I am known as the coolest wife at my husband’s company!

  • SaschaPoles

    Member
    April 12, 2009 at 5:27 pm

    i think you’ll find the typical stereotypes, especially where we live jacq, but its definitely an interesting experience. you’ll find that most of the girls are normal people just playing a part, whenever im with the troupe at a show or whatever, it’s all sex kitten stuff on stage, and then in the back dressing room we’re all talking about how we cant wait to go home or go eat like pigs…..its all acting really. if i can come to binghamton for that amateur night, you’ll have to go with me!!!! we’ve gotta hangout at least once doncha-know!!! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif

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