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Pole and mental illness
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Wow, thank you all so much for sharing your stories with me! It's really good to know that I'm not the only one. 🙂
I've got a history of depression and I'm struggling through a particularly rough bit right now. Pole has become slightly frustrating and unappealing, and I'm not very sure how to convey emotion through dance when I can't feel them. I know that this is something I enjoy doing so I'll be continuing to dance in the hopes that it'll pick me up again.
Steffie, I'm so glad that you found something to help keep you motivated to stay well. I've also suffered from anorexia nervosa and pole dancing has been providing me with the most motivation to get up in the mornings and eat.
Thank you again, I'm so glad to hear that pole has become so instrumental in your recoveries.
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I can agree with Sassyboots- poling is the one thing I don’t feel anxious about being perfect -letting anyone in a team/group down. I FINALLY allow one thing (pole) to try & try & try. Usually I don’t try, I do or I don’t do. Failure or possibility of failure stops me for enjoying life. Pole is my outlet to ‘not be “me”, while being “truly me”‘.
Since I haven’t got a pole to fit my house, the studio is truly a therapeutic session, not just a workout -girl time. Music, accomplishment, thinking of adjusting moves for current conditions, no time for negative reacting.
Agreeing with those with e.d. In the studio I have a terrible time feeling accomplished of being a healthy weight, there’s mirrors and skinny & small ( portion; 5’- 5’5” girls everywhere) I’m a good tall height & fabulous bumbum. I have to keep reminding myself “I’m strong and I’m sexy. I am finally athletic, ( whoa, I’ve never been excited to think/say that!) SO GLAD strong is the new skinny! Strong in & out is the ultimate sexy, head toss!! -
Been dealing with depression forever, in fact i was planning my suicide (again) just a weeks before i got my pole. My life change in just a few days, for the better and everybody notice it. I only had one small episode in over 2 years and the girls here have been so helpful and supportive that i was back on my feet after a few days. This is my off switch when i need to shut my brain down and if i need to get some emotions out.
''Poling for sanity'' is a way of life and i'm happy to see so many of you use it not only for fun but also as a tool in you everyday struggle.https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_heart1.gif
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Wow, luv u Tigger!
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I was just diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Depression and am just going through the steps to deal: therapy and drugs. For July I was too depressed and super anxious and did not even want to look at my pole. Now I'm a little better…I've used it twice and had fun. I miss the old days though. I'm depressed that I'm depressed. But I think pole can really help because it is a creative outlet that is just so completely yours. I'm quite worried about the effects of the medications long term and wish I didn't have to take them! But pole does let you forget about it for a little while..
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Porshka– I know how you feel! Some days I'm in such a funk that I can only manage a few half-hearted spins before throwing in the towel and crawling back into bed for the day. Then the fact that even my pole couldnt improve my mood just emphasizes how depressed I really am, and then I feel more depressed and hopeless.
You just have to tell yourself… Tomorrow is another day. I will try again.
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I totally agree. Although I am coming from a whole other area—I am a recovering drug addict. While I still habituate and crave the one thing that keeps me "sane" and a place to divert all that crazy energy is pole. I am so thankful for it every day. The drugs kept me off the pole cuz I was so focused on that and now I am back and hoping to be better than ever. Pole—definately therapeutic.
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Tigger, hang in there girl. I've felt similar during my illness I can tell you all kinds of happy crap but anyone can do that…. what I can say is thanks for still being here!!
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Porshka, you don't have to loose a hole day, we all have bad moments, if this one isn't working then the next minute might be better!!! Never give up
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Teapartie – Thank you! 🙂 Im glad to hear that pole is helping you too! And its nice not to feel alone about it 🙂
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Echo, I think it is well stated to not wait for another day. When I am feeling depressed, it's like I am in a battle with myself and which attitude will win….. I hate going through that, but all of us just have to pull ourselves out of the funk when we feel like that. There is a saying that my grandfather always told me when something entered my life which I had doubts of being able to succeed. He would say.. "You will either sink or swim, now which one are you going to do???"….. Although he asked me that question, I did not have an option… I better suck it up and swim or I will be pulled into swimming if I wanted to or not…. Life is hard especially dealing with life issues (present & past) in addition to dealing with this economy (if anyone else is affected by it) and it is easy to lay down and try to sleep it off or lay in bed letting it manifest even more… Believe me, it is a struggle for me everyday… sometimes more than less, but I can't let this disease of depression get the best of me…. and I am telling all of you guys who are my new family that you can not let it get the best of you! I never thought about being able to express myself with anyone the way I express myself to you guys, so you all also give me the motivation to not only read but to also think and pray that our days will be filled feeling better inside and out each day. There are so many of us going through something that we have to pull through for eachother. You never know… if one of us girls are looking for motivation and need to hear a positive word and if all of us are in our funk… who will be the one to put the weight on their back and pull us from sinking to the bottom to get us swimming????
You guys just don't know how you are helping me. Life is not easy and good friends are hard to find…. I am very thankful for you all and it is our duty as a pole group family to be there for eachother. Porshka, you will make it through, just try your best to listen and/or read more positive than negative. Tigger, you can join me on planning to get better at poling. 🙂 Guys, I know its rough, but we gotta hang in there.
Thanks for reading this guys and I wish everyone day good day.
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Porshka, sassyboots — I definitely know the feeling. I mean, that's one of the requirements for depression, right? Not finding things you used to find enjoyable enjoyable? I also feel guilty that I'm not loving it more, and then I go into some downward spiral of "you can't even have fun right…everyone who does pole loves it unconditionally and SO MUCH" and "so you've just been sitting on the couch in your underwear staring at your pole, how sad". Anywayyyyy
I've never thought about pole itself as having any special effect on my depression. I do know that singing out loud and dancing to music in general (if I manage to get myself to start) always does make me feel better though. And I know exercise helps, etc, but I've never been a complete couch potato, so I am aware of the limits of exercise and training.
Okay. Before this turns into a big ball of emo since I don't think this is making anyone feel better, pole does help me! 🙂 There's usually music involved (and singing =P), and dancing, and exercise. There's also the feeling that this is something unique about you, and you're working on it all your own. No offense to athletes in other fields (hey, I am one too!) but it's always nice to know you're doing something unusual to make yourself feel special. "Guess what, I'm not boring!"
And just FYI, after being reluctant and inconsistent for a while, I've finally been taking medication for almost a year, and it's been good. There are still bad days/weeks of course, and it might be true that no one "needs" drugs to battle the demons, but the stigma is no reason not to take them if you can afford them and have a therapist/doctor to monitor it. As my friend put it once "hey, most of my family is on it, and they are happier and better people because of it, so there's no problem." Anti-depressants aren't shortcuts, or happy pills…they just give you a little help if you meet them halfway.
In fact, I had a pole for almost 2 years before I started consistently using it at all. It was about month 2 of antidepressants and feeling better that I got *just* enough motivation to work at it a few times a week. 🙂 It's only been a few months since then, but it's longer than I've worked at a lot of things already. =P
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Hello Brave & Beautiful Women!
It takes a great deal of courage to stand up and openly discuss anxiety, depression, eating disorders, etc. I don't know of too many other "communities" that would inspire women to be this open and honest and then to support each other in tough times! I'm honored to be part of the pole community for just these reasons!
I'd like to share a little now too. It's cathartic! I started pole dancing when my daughter was 6 months old. i had struggled with anxiety and depression for years before becoming pregnant and after Izzy was born is way BAD! Thanks to a friend I found pole dancing. The women in the studio were kind, warm, funny, and all different shapes and sizes. I felt that I fit in almost instantly. In a matter of a couple of months I noticed a difference in my energy, my mood, and my spirit. I couldn't believe how much I enjoyed and how motivated I was by this form of movement and by the women around be.
After some time I was given the amazing opportunity to train to be an instructor. I couldn't wait to help women feel the same things that I felt about myself and about pole. It didn't take long before I noticed that more and more women were experiencing the same changes that I had and I thought "this can't be a fluke. There has to be something to this that is helping women mentally as well as physically," I started doing some research andI found so much on exercise and dance but nothing that spoke specifically to pole. However, pole has several layers that are, on there own, used as therapeutic tools for a variety of reasons. I feel like these "layers" have somthing to do with the mental perks we feel when on the pole;
1) Meditation-sometimes. each studio is different
2) Community-The women, like all of you here on Studio Veena, that are supportive, encouraging, and willing to listen to total strangers!! There is a theory called "Tend and Befriend" that talks about the way women deal with stress. According to this theory we are able to better deal with stress by coming together and communicating with one another.
3) Exercise-Duh!! 😀
4) Sensual Expression/Emotional Expression Through Dance
Anyway, I continue to research all these areas and how they are connected to pole because i believe so strongly in the power of what we are all doing. Is it a magic cure for all that ales you….no. BUT it's a damn brilliant tool! I hope to continue my research on the mental benefits of pole and I would LOVE to hear more about your studios, your communities where you live, etc.
Please feel free to email me at melissatwoolever@gmail.com with anything you would like to ask or share. I also have a list of references at polisticmovement.com
Thanks for being such an outstanding group of women and thanks for taking the time to listen to me and each other 😀
M
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Depression is a day to day struggle for me. My friends and family are mostly unaware that I even have to deal with it. We are so good at hiding it aren't we? It takes so much internal pep talk to motivate me, sometimes even to just get out of bed. I literally have to argue with myself. My depressed self tells me how hopeless and worthless I am, and my reasonable self tells me how fortunate I am even to be alive and I should do something, anything, productive! Doing something always makes me feel better, whether it's cleaning, pole, grocery, teaching, socializing, etc. What doesn't make me feel better is sitting on my butt. I very rarely get upset or depressed when poling. It has happened before, if it had been a particularly bad day or week and I was (maybe only in my mind) poling very poorly. But those times have been very few in the last three years. Pole is a major pick-me-up. It's a time for me to say things in my head like "look what I can do!" and I always feel awesome afterwards, like I can take on this crazy world. I honestly don't know how I would have ended up without it… probably in a corner somewhere wallowing in my own tears. Pole keeps me in the light. 🙂
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Although poling and exercise in general helps my moods, only changing my diet has taken away my severe rapid cycling bipolar. I was in and out of treatments for a while until I was led to possible diet cure and proper nutrition really has saved my life and helped balance out the imbalanced brain chemicals and all without any more medicine I have been med free for 2 years without a single suicidal thought or "relapse". Hugs to all who deal with mental illness.
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