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custom bumper sticker causing drama
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Your hubby is correct it all comes down to perception. I got that for my hubby in shirt form and he knows who he can wear it around and who he can’t. His last command was a really laid back command, so everyone thought that it was a cool shirt and that I was the coolest person that they ever met, but on the flip side he would never wear the shirt around some of his relatives because they are still in the dark ages of pole dancing, so it would not go well. people are going to hate if it’s not “normal” to them or if it doesn’t fit into their perception of life and behavior. If you like the sticker and you know that you aren’t skeezy then leave it. If it’s starting to wear on you then maybe you should take it off and just put it on your fridge or something. When you post things you open yourself up to everyone’s opinions.
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I would not go so far as thinking people would be OFFENDED, that would be way oversensitive! I guess it just runs along the lines of those rear windshield stickers with the mother, father and 2.5 children. So, you have a perfect nuclear family! Good for you, who cares! LOL It’s just the “me better than you” thing that sticks out for me. At least that’s the way I’m thinking some people MIGHT interpret it. But maybe I’m overthinking it.
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I don’t take it as I’m better than you. I see it as someone being proud of their accomplishment no matter what it is. If I took everything I see as a “I’m better than you gesture”, then I would have to take time to myself and figure out what is missing in my life that I see this person’s choice to post their accomplishment as a Nananana-boo-boo? That’s usually why people hate on others anyway. It’s negativity in themselves (which ever fashion it should show up, bitterness, jealousy, self-hate etc.) that is rising to the surface. Other times it’s just what people were taught to believe and never challenged it. To each it’s own.
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It’s no different than when the Pussycat Dolls sing “Don’t you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?”
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That sticker/shirt is pretty snarky regardless of who is looking at it. While I find it kinda funny in a snarky sort of way, I do think the comparison implies that one of these women is better, or more desirable, than the other. Personally, I feel like there is a difference between being proud of one’s accomplishments and pointing out what others can’t/don’t do. For example, I worked on the shoulder mount for a long time before I got it, so when I did get it, I was really proud of that accomplishment. I told a friend who doesn’t pole dance what I could finally do, and she was happy for me, presumably because she could tell I was excited. What I did not, and would not do is point out that she can’t shoulder mount, even though I doubt she was capable of doing so (at that time). My point is, I can be proud of my accomplishments without making comparisons to other people and what they cannot or choose not to do. Good or bad, I think that sticker/shirt says more than just, my wife pole dances and I’m proud of her.
I do wonder, if you already get negative reactions about pole, why would you put a sticker on your husband’s car? It seems to me that a more effective way to start positive conversations about pole based on a bumper sticker would be to put a sticker that said something like “I love pole fitness” on your car. People who are uncomfortable with pole probably aren’t going to like that either, but I think people who are neutral, or don’t know much about pole, might be more likely to respond positively to that message, especially if the word “fitness” was used.
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I just wanted to add that I’m not trying to say that anyone is wrong for liking the sticker/shirt, or finding it funny, or even displaying it on their shirt or vehicle. I’m just trying to explain why it makes me uneasy, even though it made me snicker at first.
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I started pole fitness when my wife was in the Army. It was our little secret for a while. After a while, I kinda loosened up and mention the fact to a few friends. Generally, (after a quick comment about dollar bills and thongs) they would commend me on my physical displays of things they couldn’t even dream of doing. Also, knowing I was an elite gymnast, they were not surprised at my choice of this extracurricular. They had a knee jerk reaction that was biased and based on prejudice but when they thought about it for a moment, they realized that I’m still me. The majority of people are clueless as to what “pole” means to the majority of us veeners. I feel like the bumper sticker never offers an opportunity to get to know you or set aside any misconceptions… it’s sort of like rubbing what you do in people’s faces. While it “shouldn’t” be a catalyst for such negativity, it definitely shouldn’t be a mystery why it provokes harsh comments.
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It’s not a mystery. I know that people have that reaction. I was surprised at it on the page but not really. I am happy with it that’s why it’s on my vehicle. I am a bit snarky any ways but sadly I have to defend what I do regularly whether I had that sticker or noT. I am a bit more surprised at some of these comments more so then the people trash talking it 🙂 but still not offended or hurt or anything. I still feel it’s unique and funny to me. And my husband supports it 🙂
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I think you’re right marinebarbie, the bumper sticker is just a bit of humor. I see snarky bumper stickers of all sorts. I don’t take them as a personal offense nor do I feel someone should be made to feel bad about being proud of what you do and having a sense of humor about it. I’m surprised by some of the comments here myself. It’s a funny sticker.
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Well it’s like stated before it’s all on perception if you see it as a snarky my wife is better than yours then oh well that’s you. my hubby wears it cause he loves that I pole. It’s no different then the cross-fit stuff that is out there. Some merchandise gives off the “If you don’t cross fit then you aren’t working hard enough. I don’t see it that way, but some people do. Remember that uproar over that lady that was in a bikini with her 3 children and the caption said “What’s your excuse”? So many people thought that she was “Fat Shaming” I didn’t not feel that way. I mean dang she has 2 businesses and 3 children, and she was in phenomenal shape. I however don’t have any kids and I work one full-time job. Why am I not in better shape. (Not her shape, but better shape). So what is for one person isn’t for another that is society and reality, it’s where we live. If you can’t do it that has nothing to do with me. That’s ALL YOU. There are classes and lessons that will teach you how to do it. Then you will cross over from not being able to do it, to attempting it and if you stick with it, being able to do it. People aren’t going to always like what we do. I’m just not sensitive, to what people post. My Hubby better think that I’m better than someone else’s wife or I may have a problem. Hello! =)
I’m not out to appeal to other women’s husbands, i don’t think any of us are, but if we feel sexy, strong, and confident doing this then screw the haters! Let them sit in there self doubts and whatever low self-esteem that they got going on and you do you. Make no apologies. Life’s too short to overly care about what people think of you. As for comparing I did it with a 9 year old. Lol, I was in a contortion class and it’s mostly kids and the little girl did a chest stand and brought her little feet to her head and said, “Can you do this?” Knowing good and darn well I couldn’t. So I smiled at her and said, “No, but I can drive and stay up past 9P.M., can you?!” That was snarky and funny and we had a good time in our class together she gave me one of the best pieces of advice. “Don’t eat before coming to class cause you don’t want to fart on your head.” We compare even when we don’t know it, we may not always say it out loud or post it for all the world to see. We’re all different we all live our lives differently. If you don’t post things like that, good on you you’re not that type of person. If you do rock on, but be mindful that not everyone is going to like what you post. -
I think this is great! by this, I mean the whole discussion. It’s exactly the kind of things that keep me connected to SV. it’s a provocative graphic for sure, hence it has provoked all this fantastic debate and discussion about it. And it probably does so out in the wide world wherever anybody sees it too… It obviously has an element of humor, probably some snarkiness as some have suggested, for sure some pride, etc… really everything that all of you have addressed… Probably even some offensiveness as well as some supportiveness built into it… anyway just wanted to chime back in to say this and to thank u all for ur very thoughtful responses and for keeping it civil, LOL. If anyone recalls I am the one who way above posted the request for more elaboraton on the whole “military wife stereotypes” matter and so I especially appreciate those replies… insightful indeed, I think I “get it” now… tho the craziest part is that what I think I mostly took away from this part of the thread is that there is not even any 1 single consistent image or stereotype of that “military wife” even just amongst those commenting here — some allude to a very “well-behaved” one, others to the opposite… some more to the physical image others to their “intentions” (the hook-up for an easy steady income, etc)… either way, I’m sorry that you are all pegged as ANYTHING, whatever it may be… it’s not fair to anyone to be pre-judged, under Amy circumstances. I appreciate my “freedom” from this as the wife of a civilian that much more…
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OMG had to reply again bc @Cantetinza17 that is hilarious and wise advice indeed from your young classmate, u had me LOL… other random things this made me think of in terms of sticker / t-shirt graphics: 26.2, 13.1, 0.0 (my favorite, so hilarious but obviously a jab at the higher numbers — but are the higher #s a snub at those who have not run any such distance? or just pride…?)… yoga pose silhouettes, bicycles (my husband is to cycling what we are to pole — maybe worse), “namaste”… republican, democrat, green… my school ur school (primary, college, etc)… rainbow flags, “coexist”… wow the list goes on… maybe this just all boils down to “this is my identity — this is what I stand for”…?
haha, on that note, “wag more, bark less” 🙂
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Firebird,
You lost me at the numbers. Are those like run times or mathematics. Either way I don’t do well at either one. If I saw that on a car. All you would see me do the blink, blink then lean over to my hubby and ask very quietly I don’t want anyone else to know that I don’t know; “What does that mean?” lolI thought that was great advice too.
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upon further consideration, I think I would LOVE it if farting on my own head was a very real risk for me — what a GREAT problem to have!
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ROFLMBO! The new drunken party trick!
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