[Charley]

I’m fairly small and I love the 40, I had one up for several months and many students seemed to love it as well. Ask pole if you can return the unneeded extension for the right one. Worst case scenario, you don’t like th 40 and you put it back on eBay for what you paid :). Then get a new one. Personally I think the 45 is th eperfect size for everyone. Spoke has great customer service I’m sure they will help.

[Charley]

Kelly is amazing! I will warn she’s really busy! She coaches everyone and their sister so if you have a tough timeline make sure you tell her and have everything ready to send, song, vids, etc. if you choose her you will not be disappointed. I think Kelly is the busiest woman in pole! I adore her and highly recommend her. Michelle stanek whom I’ve not worked with does Skype too. I’ve heard incredible things about everyone at B&P.

[Charley]

Try yoga direct or amazon. I got mine from yd. 🙂

[Charley]

Chemmie, it’s so amazing each year to see everyone and see new performers of all levels and our stars all sharing the stage in unity with respect and love for each other. You and your hubby seriously saved my booty a bunch this past year, thank you sooo much! I couldn’t have done it without your help.

So if anyone ever wants to see or participate Ina large open showcase pm me! We define beauty standards in my opinion. You can also check out head over heals, Florida pole showcase and aerial Amy’s NYC showcase. There are many, many more popping up too! For anyone who wants to compete Amy Guion does PSO and has levels 1-4 so anyone can compete, it’s pay to play, no entry videos. There are alot of great events opening up all over for all of us. There is also pole con and pole expo I’m not sure how to go about performing at them though but I know you can. I recommend attending a pole event if you can especially if you are feeling down its just such a boost. The events is where you will see all shapes, sizes, colors and genders.

[Charley]

@Chemmie, I just adore you and I love th fact we can discuss these things and grow. With Claire, most of her combos and her floor work were my ideas and she had to learn moves and holds very quickly and she blew my freaking mind! I loved doing a piece for her because its not how I dance at all. We are working on something right now that is super exciting, for me, anyway. She’s still really new to pole and its easy to forget that when she’s sooo strong. I’d say 25% of the routine you saw had stuff that she had to learn in under a month, smooth it out and make it flow. She has a very natural grace on the pole making her a dreamto work with. She’s also very charismatic on stage. We’ve made a good team because the stuff I’m bad at she’s a beast at the stuff she’s bad at, I’m good at. She doesn’t have a big pole vocabulary yet because its been so little time on the pole but she’s quickly learning new things and learning how to put them together. She’s growing exponentially. Her concept of that piece was very challenging to work with but she pulled it off so beautifully. I get ideas for her a lot and will call her and be like “this would be a cool idea, what do you think?” Together we make it happen. My friend Kathleen steps in at the end and goes over stage stuff with her as Kat does for me as well.

To the op. I’d Facebook whomever you want to work with they might Skype. I highly recommend Phienix especially if its just tweaks you need. She’s very affordable and freaking priceless to work with.

I don’t think everyone needs a coach or trainer but I believe everyone has someone in their life that fills that role. My Kat and I are always coming up with ideas for each other and playing with them. Again it’s more like I think you should dance to this song. It could be this or that. Never here’s your moves and 8 count and that’s what chemmie is saying. Part of the awesome part of pole is that you can move in a non standard way. There is not choreography dating back a thousand years. I also agree with what’s been said about artist interpretation. I teach a lot of Choreo and everyone does it differently. Which I love. I actually teach my comp routine (portions) to my upper level girls so I can see it on different bodies and I get inspired and make changes so stores based on what I see. It’s innovation vs recreation. Chemmies just sayi h shed rather see a piece that is wholly the artist even if they worked with a coach vs a recreated winning piece that has no significance to the artist. Right?

[Charley]

You can do it from chopsticks 🙂

[Charley]

I think this a great topic. If we don’t continue to question things as the community we could find ourselves one day with a broken system. For as big as it is, pole is still really small, small enough to know everyone, it keeps most people honest but one day it won’t be.

I’d never have realized what the pros go through either had I not worked with a few. I’ve had a few stay with me during events and they’ve been so open and awesome about their lives and even pole. They all really love the pole world even if they don’t have time to come on here. They do read what we write and are aware. So do pole companies and a thread like this might inspire them to sponsor an unknown or even question their own marketing methods and maybe take on performers who are more artistic and less fonji,lol. This is a great topic for keeping marketing methods in check. I think on a smaller level this beauty standard that gets pushed everywhere in our lives has led me to personally want to showcase and promote dancers with different body types and abilities. I run a yearly showcase in Michigan that features about 50 everyday dancers and a few pros. It’s such a love fest and so inspiring.

And one more thing I thought of. At one point, and I’m not sure what the relationship is now, but Lulu aka minicoupergirl was a sponsored athlete with Platinum Stages. I loved that. Lulu inspires me because she continues to compete and perform right along side the teensiest of girls. She puts on a show! Extremely entertaining and very bendy, she also blogs about her life here sometimes about competing in high level comps and making costumes. She’s been on tv spreading pole love and spreading the message that you don’t have to be a size 2. I really admire her both as a performer and a spokesperson.

[Charley]

I understand what you are saying chemmie. It’s the difference between an artist and an athlete. The difference between a singer and a song writer.

I love having a choreographer to help bring my vision alive. I will also say the downside for me, and Kelly and I have had this conversation, is that I don’t trust myself enough. I really rely on getting a thumbs up from someone when I don’t have to. I tend to start over analyzing everything and stop putting myself into it because I want perfection. So, I’d say part of Kelly’s job in woking with me is helping me trust my own ideas and decisions, which she is a billion percent supportive of.

For what it’s worth all 3 trainers I’ve worked with have all sat down and said what do you have? Kelly this last time gave me the option of having her put together combos for me or I could do it, I ended up using a mix because my pole wasn’t tall enough to safely run through the combos. All of the things she gave me were based on a list of videos I sent her. I did one Skype with Phoenix and it was more about taking what I had a cleaning up the lines and feet. When I worked with Leigh Ann it was about conveying the character through my body so we did a ton of acting/dance exercises.

I think newer dancers and those without a dance background benefit huge from having a coach. I’d say every time I’ve worked with someone it’s been more coaching than anything. It’s paying someone with a broader knowledge base to bring it all together with me.

For those whom I do every step for, typically they are newer dancers that don’t have a lot of pole knowledge. Usually proling under a couple of years. I can say too. That they all come back with their own themes and ideas once they get through the process of putting a piece together.

Kelly and Leigh Ann have been so instrumental in my dancing and teaching. They’ve given me so much beyond this move then that one. They’ve both helped me understand my body better and being able to work with them I’ve come up with my own methods of choreography that I wouldn’t have otherwise explored. I would work them outside of competition but its so expensive that I can really only justify it during those times.

I’d also like to think through working with a few of my girls I’ve done the same thing.?

I do understand though chemmie, you want to see the artists creativity and have it be their vision, not a winning piece from someone else’s head. I think most of the time we are seeing the artist and her vision she just had help. I know for I’ve always had control over my vision but I’ve gotten help with the areas I questioned.

[Charley]

I hope that’s not true chemmie. Omg! Chemmie is in my auto correct! Love!

I do think for some comps they may desire sue sky clean winners or more all American looking but everyone should have a fair shake. I believe in my heart we are getting away from this. I know one comp for sure wants a spokesperson/awesome poler and they have a q&a round like a pageant. I see no harm in this as its put there as part of why they do, it’s when you don’t know that it’s an issue….

[Charley]

Tiny hands here! I can do almost all my tricks on a 50. Lifts are harder because I can’t grip as well and I don’t feel secure but I can perform them. I can’t even touch fingers on a 45, so super small. I found when I used better technique the 50 was much easier, I had to I prove my shoulder, bicep and tricep strength before I could utilize the 50 to my best which translated to better tricks on the 45. I don’t love 50s because it just never feels good but you can get get there. I used to teach on 50s and after a few minutes wouldn’t notice. Also try gloves for added security. Gives me way more confidence :). There are tricks I can’t do on a 50 if they require grip changes rapidly like the Phoenix or fonji. Hang in there I swear it gets better.

[Charley]

Thank you Danielle! 🙂

I think it’s like acting. I remember listening to an incredible interview with the woman who played the oldest aunt on the Sabrina teenage witch show. She’d been acting for 20 years or something, steady but hadn’t achieved “fame.” She considers herself a working actress. I can tell you she was pleased with her career and had a lot of fun doing what she loved. Her take on “fame” was not that she wasn’t pretty enough or talented enough but just had not found the role that would catapult her to beyond kardashian level fame. She also tended towards stage work which is its own demon and rarely provides great fame since its only accessible to the audience, it’s not televised. She did what she loved and made a life for herself with her talents and desire. That story will always stick with me,

So in regards to beauty and pole, I think that you will find that is common amongst all upper echelon of performers. I mean we wear lots of stage make up and sparkles so of course everyone looks gorgeous! I think everyone looks beautiful when they perform with their eye lashes and outfits and shoes! And that goes for all body types. That’s just performing. We all look amazing. Nobody goes on stage with no make up in sweats, lol!

I also think you can be a pole model and not be “famous”. I look around here and fb and see so much beauty and under rated dancing its amazing. There isn’t enough time in the day to watch all the great performers. When I did GND Chicago, I hadn’t heard of many of the girls and I was freaking blown away and am sad I didn’t get to see every performance through its completion. They made me laugh and cry.

Th thing I love about pole is that there isn’t a particular beauty mold. There is a recipe for championships no doubt. It not because of an agenda but because at that level you kinda need to tough and strong.

Ill also add our high ranking dancers all love pole and women. They want to empower all of us and each other. At no point would any of them feel good thinking we are feeling bad because of their skin deep beauty. Each champ I’ve met or worked with has made ME personally feel great.

[Charley]

At the end of the day after spending much time with a few champions and high ranking professionals I can tell you they struggle like we do. They have fear, insecurities and also feel the need to keep winning to stay on top. It’s a lot of pressure for them too.

Consider the day in the life of a champion. You aren’t just poling for fun anymore, you’ve spent money and lots of it to compete, train, be outfitted, etc. You’re struggling to be better than your last performance, especially if it was award winning. You are working to stay in top of every new move and innovate new things, the things you’ve already showcased are being done now worldwide amongst your peers, you have to come with something new now. Your value as a dancer has become your market, read financial, value. Not on,y are you training for your competitions but now you’re marketing yourself for workshops once you get to said city for said competition and that’s only if that competition will even allow you teach workshops. Workshops take time away from your practice but you need them to survive and pay for your competition. Now you’re being asked to judge smaller competitions. One more thing to balance. If you’re not super known yet few people will book you. That means you might be trying to balance a real job and pole like Natasha Wang or Nadia Sharif did. So now, you’re working, training at night…and not just pole. Contortion. Dance. Yoga. Gym. Pole. So now you’ve gotten known enough, you’re in a world comp, you’re paying for that trip. You’re training others on pole and trying to fit in your own practice. You want to win because who doesn’t? Your hard work should mean something, right? You go. You dance. You don’t place well. Now you’re back to the grindstone wondering if the loss has cost you anything financially. Are you still great? Does this change the way you are viewed?

It’s all the same feelings no matter where you’re at. Am I good enough? Am I talented? Can I make a living doing this? What did I do wrong? Why don’t the judges like me? I’m working harder than ever before but not getting better. What else do i need to do? Am I pretty enough? Is my body strong enough, good enough, bendy enough, etc?

We are all women.

I’m the community theater of pole dancing. Not good enough to be an actress but this is what I love to do so I teach some classes, share my love for others and pole, find some small performances or comps and try. I keep trying because community theater has value too. I’m doing the same things the pros are just on a much smaller playing field.

I hope that perspective helps.

[Charley]

As a competitor:
I’ve personally worked with Phoenix, Kelly and Leigh Ann on various pieces and I loved them. I also provide choreography for Claire Beer and my students. Prices range from $150-50/hr. It depends on how you want to work and their availability. I skyped with Leigh Ann and Phoenix and liked the instant feedback. I do phone convos with Kelly and like that too because I look and see what she’s saying. The price very much depends on what you need and what you already have. I always come up with my own stuff then get tweaking and combo advice plus help with stage presence, fluidity and trouble shooting timing and intro/outros and costume. I never compete without a trainer, I get too much additional training, inspiration and help with problem moves, combos, etc. that helps me overall.

As a choreographer:
Now, for some people I do provide the entire piece because some are great performers but not great at coming up with things on their own. I have 2 students I work with for shows. 1 is very good at performing and being on stage but not great with creativity or putting it together, I do every nuance for her and she owns it like no other because I only give her what fits her, the other will do privates to work out a couple things but already has the whole thing in her head. They are just different people with different talents. Giving someone an idea to work with is to me is as valid as giving someone a combo. Most people will take your ideas that had for them because you know them and make it theirs anyway. I love being the idea person. I can be creative in a whole new way with a body that can do things mine can’t. It’s like playing Barbie. 🙂

[Charley]

Interesting topic. I’ve had this conversation in my head many times. Being on the inside of competitions I’ve always analyzed my own constant failings at them from my ability to be even chosen to my ability to place well. While I don’t think it’s my body or face that exempts me from procuring titles and success it’s my level of ability, I do see what you are talking a out. I suffer from b face. I tend to seem unapproachable because I’m socially terrified (it takes all I have to run around and mingle at events, it’s really hard when you suffer from anxiety) and therefor I’m not very good at making eye contact with judges, I just assume they’ll hate whatever I do, I can’t dance on stage the way I dance at home and half the time, when I’m submitting something I choke, I get scared and generally do not get favor with online judges. A lot of it is my b face, a lot of it is my anxiety, but most of it is that I’m doing competition level dances. I get to caught up in my story and not enough in my tricks. I’m not doing fonjis and exciting moves and that seems to be what sells. In order to do those things you will see a common body type, it’s just not as possible to perform that level without being extremely fit. I think that’s why we don’t see as much diversity body wise amongst high ranking pole dancers. Also consider lines, extension and form – those things look nicer aesthetically on longer bodies, small but proportionate bodies, etc. it’s much easier to make a simple move look gorgeous when you have long legs or a thin waist. We all struggle to find moves that work on all levels for our body. Also think about how many high ranking dancers have a background in something else. They’ve been training their bodies for this their whole life. They have an advantage of body awareness that someone like myself does not have, they know which angles to do things to produce the best looking trick. It all goes together.

I’m inspired by our high ranking pole dancers. It takes a lot of work to get there and for some it may be unattainable due to genetics, time, age, ability, etc. I think it’s important to realize these professionals are just that professional. It’s okay not to attain super poler status, attaining that comes with great sacrifice. This is why I look to all of you as we’ll as professionals for inspiration and hope. This journey heals us inside and out. We are all super stars.

[Charley]

Yup, yup! I’ll be there! :). Can’t wait to meet you!