[Cinara]

It definitely depends on the spin. I could do spins with at least one leg on the pole on static within about 6 weeks, but I do have a gymnastic background. Spins with one hand and at least one leg on the pole on spinny setting in about 2-3 months. One handed spins on static with legs off the pole… well I could do a few after about 6 months. And one-handed spins with both legs off the pole? I have done two different spins once each and I've been poling for a year. I find it takes less strength to hold an aysha (hands on, legs off upside down) than to hang off one hand on spin. (At least for me)

And as a cautionary tale: any spin where your hands are in a split grip should be counted as a one-handed spin. You can really injure your bottom hand if you place much weight on it when you spin with your thumb pointing down. I make sure I'm not even gripping the pole with my bottom hand, just placing it on the pole and pushing.

[Cinara]

I love the before and after idea! I'm also a "wait until I'm better" person, but I also suspect that no matter how good I get I'll still be thinking the same thing. So by that logic, only Felix is allowed to have music, (or insert other dancer, I have no internal scale of top poledancer goodness).

I really hesitate to dance to the songs I really like because I feel like if I'm not perfect I'm being disrespectful to the song or something. But the person who performed the song didn't say "I won't release this until I'm better", or they would have never released the song. So therefore they are not as good as they theoretically could be, so really by providing a backing for my dancing they are being just as disrespectful to me as I am to them…?? 

These are the things I have to tell myself.

But the arguments of hookedonpole are far mightier than any of my "logic". Thank you everyone for freeing me up to dance to songs I like. Yaaaaayyyyyy!

[Cinara]

Unless you're on fire, don't cancel classes. All it can take is one cancelled class for a customer to lose their momentum and stop coming. Try to have someone you can call in on a casual basis if you can't make a class.

When you first start a business, lots of your first customers will be your friends and family. But when you're working, you can't chat to them or spend more time on them. If you want to catch up, do it outside of fitness time. You can explain this to them before hand if you're worried they fee; snubbed. The same thing goes for your staff. They may be your best friends, but keep the palling around for outside work time. This sort of thing can really put off other customers and make them feel unwelcome – and a person who doesn't know you's word-of-mouth promotion is worth a lot more than a friends'.

Make sure you have a really professional website, and optimise your google/bing searching to help people find you.

Obviously you wouldn't say anything negative about your customers' bodies, but don't say anything negative about your own body either, or talk about dieting or losing weight (unless you are consulting someone on losing weight and have the qualification to do so). So many women are self-conscious about their bodies, especially in workout clothes, and any sort of focus on body image can make (at least me) feel uncomfortable.

[Cinara]

I just tried a cheating method to warm up my chrome x-pole. I put my heater about 15cm away from the pole and left it on for a few minutes. I also used vinegar, and then rubbed the pole really hard and also used Dry Hands. It made my pole the stickiest it's ever been. It was like brass (for like 5 minutes until my sweaty oily hands ruined it.)

Using spins and basic moves to warm up your pole is probably better, so you can discipline yourself to practice dance as well as tricks. But if you just want to warm up the pole quickly to do some strength or something, try a heater.

[Cinara]

I'm fairly sure it is the grip Felix uses, considering she's from/associated with Bobbi's where they teach it. I don't know necessarily think it's cheating, but it does seem to require much less strength than the other grips. As a downside it is quite awkward to connect to other moves because one hand is so high. The other grips would probably give you more versatility in terms of combos. I once tried to go into a brass monkey from this grip and ended up in a horrible tangle and had to slooowly slide down the pole in a big knot because there was nothing else I could do  

Also, UT I am so trying out your advice next time I'm on the pole!

[Cinara]

Looking at the pictures on Wikipole, I'm not entirely sure if it's a respect grip or princess grip I'm talking about. But you start standing to the side of the pole, with your inside hand above your head. Then, keep your inside hand there and walk your body in front of the pole until the pole is pressed against the shoudler of your inside arm (this is the unkind to wrists bit). The outside arm just grabs the same as you would in a cupped grip. Does that make sense? 

By the way, don't wrap your thumbs around the pole because it hurts like crazy!

It feels much more secure for my sweaty slippery hands, and seems to be much easier to use (for me), but it took a little while before my arm was comfortable in that position, and I don't know… I can just see awkward position + not controlled enough invert + bad luck/bad ligaments equalling injury. Still, it's the way it gets taught to heaps of girls at my studio and noone seems to get hurt…

But I don't think you can do a shoulder mount roll or get into a brass monkey from it, plus it's awkward to get into in the air, so I'm working on cupped and Veena grip now.

[Cinara]

Aargh some guys are just so frustratingly naturally strong. I've heard of guys who can just shoulder mount before. Usually I console myself by knowing that their body rolls and hip wiggles tend to look just plain sad

As for the shoudler mount, I don't know that I can be much help as I'm struggling myself. I can only do it from a respect grip (I think?) which is not exactly the kindest thing you can do to your wrist. The main things that seem to help me are trying it from squatting on the floor first, making sure the pole is being pushed right into my shoulder, and thinking of pulling my legs back behind my shoulders, not straight up the pole.

[Cinara]

As someone currently writing up a PhD thesis that's related to motor learning*, I can confirm that having skills and losing them is 100% normal in the learning process. When you learn something new the way you do it will be subtly different all the time, and things like your balance point, which muscles you use, the exact positioning of your limbs, etc, etc will vary wildly. This is because your brain needs to work out exactly how to activate itself to get you to do the move, and it does so through trial and error.

In something like a gemini, you won't really notice how variable you are, because you have a huge margin for error where you can do it completely differently but still stick to the pole, and the only difference is in your lines. So even a reasonably large difference in how you do the trick will still technically be a gemini. In an aysha or a cartwheel, your balance is much more precarious so even a small variation will cause you to fall down.

The thing about learning a lot of skills very quickly (which is something I do too) is that it means that from a neurological point of view, you probably haven't mastered a lot of them. You need to keep repeating, and repeating, and repeating until all the variability goes away and your brain can give stable, consistent instructions to your muscles. Even then, every time you move to a different pole, lose or gain weight, get more flexible, get dehydrated, etc, it will make you more variable again. So you keep practicing, and gradually your brain gets better at compensating for all of those factors and you really master a move.

Personally, I can say that although I can aysha and sometimes cartwheel, I am still months away from mastering them. I face the same problem that I think you do that I get a big payoff for learning new tricks, but find it harder to feel happy about my improvements in fluidness, confidence, or consistency. And I wonder if you're as unfairly hard on yourself as I am on myself. So what do we do?

Amy's suggestion of working on some dance is a good one, because you haven't mastered any trick until you can work it into a dance. I can tell you now that while I'm advanced in terms of just getting up and doing tricks, I'm a solid intermediate when it comes to incorporating anything into dance. And almost still a beginner at free dancing. Seriously, the other day I inverted, got into a pole handstand and just froze up and didn't know what to do next. But incorporating tricks into dance will really help your brain learn to do them in different contexts. 

Also, video your dancing and combos, watch them back and black out the backgrounds on pictures like you already do. That will help you to notice your improvements in dance skills, and in your lines. I don't know how you black out the backgrounds, but I start out by drawing a black outline aroung myself in Paint.net which helps me really notice my lines. Hopefully that will help you to feel a sense of achievement out of mastering new moves as well as just learning them.

* I hope this all makes sense. I'm trying to recall Esther Thelen's fascinating work on dynamic systems theory as it relates to infant motor development and apply the theory to poledancing, so I hope I didn't get too cringe-inducingly pop science, or conversely too confusing. Incidentally my PhD is looking at dynamic systems theory as it applies to children's speech.

Sorry for the novel, but this is a really interesting topic to me. Sending lots of encouragement your way, and remember this is a totally normal part of the learning process.

[Cinara]

Here's some general advice that really helped me get this move:

1. Make sure your head is above your hands

2. If you're going from a pole climb and sit, start inverting as soon an you release so you can use a bit of momentum: don't just hang by your hands (unless you're building strength)

3. Invert in a tuck position, and only extend your legs once you're all the way upside down – it's not quite as impressive but still pretty enough.

4. Don't think about lifting your legs straight up. Instead think of bringing them back over your shoulders.

5. It's slightly easier on a spinning pole.

Even with all this it's a seriously tiring move. I can do it, but after a few times my technique starts to fall off.

[Cinara]

I know the rough heels problem well. I hate shoes and only wear them when being barefoot would not be socially acceptable (or they're six inch platforms and I'm poling) so I am somewhat prone.. When it's a minor case I usually just use a pumice stone on my heels when I have a shower. But when they get really rough or cracked sometimes it isn't enough.

The one thing I've had work and seen work for other people is this heel cream called Eulactol here in Australia. It's an Australian-made product so you'd either need to order online from an Australian online pharmacy, or find something with similar ingredients in the US. From what I read, I think urea is the main active ingredient, but here's the ingredient list I found online:

purified water, urea, lanolin, petrolatum, decyl oleate, dicoyl pentaerythrityl distearyl citrate, propylene glycol, microcrystalline wax, dimethicone, glyceryl oleate, carbomer, triethanolamine, aluminium stearate, methylparaben, propylparaben, butylparaben, ethylparaben, propyl gallate, citric acid, bha, fragrance.

[Cinara]

I've always assumed I couldn't even try a twisted ballerina because I didn't have enough back flexibility. So no help on that side. But, I did learn recently that a lot of what appears to be back flexibility is actually hip flexor flexibility. I'd love to hear about some new stretches to try too.

[Cinara]

Aha, I didn't know a shooting star was also called jasmine. That may very well be the answer. Thanks!

[Cinara]

Pole twin, just be careful with the twisted grip: warm up, go into it from an invert and watch out for owwies. I know you will be but it is hard on the joints at first I don't want to be responsible  for anyone getting hurt. Still, it's a handy grip to have for transitions.

[Cinara]

As an ex-gymnast, I was something of a natural when I first started learning to pole, and believe me, there is always someone better. I look at Blondebird's incredible strength, and I just want to give up and go home.

I work as a speech therapist and I have a theory that "Eventually everyone hits a wall". I based this theory on academics – some people hit the wall early on like learning to read, others not until they go to grad school and struggle with reading academic texts. The difference is, the person who hits the wall early on gains the tools to work thorugh the difficulty and find a solution which makes it easy to overcome any future difficulties (or at least they will after they see mee :p) The person who has an easy time up until grad school finds themselves struggling, and has nothing because they never had the opportunity to learn what to do when academics gets tough. And I think it's the same with pole. You're just getting the hitting-a-wall stage over and done with early.

Some people hit a wall early on, whether it's with inverts, or even hanging off the pole. But, while they are working on that sort of thing, they are also learning perfect technique (because their technique will need to be perfect to finally get the skill), they are becoming stronger, more fluid and more aware of their bodies faster by repeating the action over and over again, and they are gaining the mental ability to persevere when things get tough.

Meanwhile the person who gets the skill quickly doesn't get to learn any of these things, but instead more skills. But trust me, that person will hit a wall sooner or later (Probably. If you never did, I don't want to hear it). Like for me, I blazed through lots of the early stuff, but then I started getting injured and started struggling with some previously accquired moves. See, my gymnastics training meant I already had a fair idea of how to do a lot of moves – a basic invert is very similar to a pull-around for instance. So I just applied the gymnastic knowledge to the pole.

But, that means my pole technique wasn't 100% perfect. And I had to go back and relearn skills with perfect technique just to fix up my lines and prevent injury. So I can't learn an allegra yet because it bruises my thigh too much, because I haven't toughened it up, because my body was in the wrong position in a scorpio, but to get a better position for a scorpio I have to change the way I do my chopper. And because I've done everything the wrong way so many times, it's harder to relearn it all. Plus, too much of my enjoyment was based on ticking off new skills, so I've had to go back to learning to just have fun again.

But I'm going to work through it, and hopefully in the distant future when I'm having trouble with a Flying K or something equally ridiculously hard I'll find it easier to persevere. 

Hopefully, once you finally get the hang of the basics, you will find it easier to keep learning because you'll have had the correct technique from the start. And hopefully be less injury prone, because all the not-so-sucessful attempts will have built your strength. And, when you do come across difficult skills in the future, you will have worked out a way to get through it mentally as well.

Good luck climbing the wall, and most likely all the other walls in your way will be much smaller thanks to all the work you're putting in now.

[Cinara]

I learnt a forearm grip first, but my ability to do it is highly seasonal. I tend to have sweaty hands and I slip more in this grip. So I can do it in winter but not in summer. I think it's because I can't get my hips as far from the pole, so there is more force running parallel to the pole, and I'm more reliant on hand friction. It seems that for my sweaty hands, the further I can get my body from the pole, the less slip I have. Plus, if I do slip, I'll flip over onto my feet instead of sliding down the pole head first.

My elbow grip is slightly better than a forearm grip in the summer, but there's still the same problem of not being able to get my body as far from the pole.

The easiest grip for me is the twisted split grip, as you can see in my profile pic. I can hold it for over 10 seconds (I usually get bored and start trying different stuff from there which is how I lose my balance). Veena, I promise I'm very careful with it, never kick up, don't practice excessively, stretch forearms, etc.

I just got a split grip jacknife and can push into a straightedge for a few seconds (yay!) No aysha for me yet thanks to my injured hip. Once I've practiced the split grip a bit more I think I'll like it much better than the other grips. Yeah, it's been a long hard road to get any balance in it, but I suspect once I get it it will be more secure and less subject to the vagaries of the weather. Plus handsprings and cartwheels!