DharmaDancer
Forum Replies Created
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I have to pipe in again. I agree that preparing for the future is crucial, and having clear goals rooted in the mundane of bills and education is important. But pole, like any other passion, can provide a living provided that it, via performance, teaching, or studio ownership, or pole or pole clothing manufacture, or whatever avenue opens involving pole, meets not only your own needs but meets a need for others. A living is made by providing a service or a solution that people need. If it’s for you alone it’s a hobby. If you can meet a need for others it’s a living. Both are wonderful options. I myself have transformed my hobby (woodworking) into a full time business (repair and restoration of wood furniture and antiques), and I left a solid, steady job in EMS to devote myself to my dream. My passion has not waned as my hobby has become a career, but it’s been upgraded as I now work with deadlines and other requirements to meet the needs of clients. For me, this is an exciting transformation and I embrace it. I give thanks daily for having the cojones to make this leap, for the clients who trust me with their property, and for every piece of furniture that comes through my shop and my calloused and cut hands. I’ve had tight months…I strip to make up for the initial debt I incurred in striking forth upon my dream, and I’m grateful to enjoy doing that and having it as an option as I move forward. A time will come when I won’t be dancing and I embrace each evening in the club because soon I’ll be making enough to fully support myself in the workshop. I have an Ivy League education and have traveled the world. ..but I’m happiest with old broken furniture and happy to be covered in sawdust and epoxy at the end of my workday, happy to see clients behold their restored furniture with eyes wide with amazement. My passionate advice: follow your heart and find a way that you can make your heart’s desire into a commodity that meets the needs of others and go balls to the wall to make it so. I am living proof that even the most quirky dreams can come true and can support you. If pole is a gift to you, find a way that you can give pole as a gift to others. And there you will find your career and your living. Make it so!
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One thing to consider is that you can make choices that steadily and surely bring you closer to the pole life you envision. But if you postpone college, or skip altogether, not only will it become much harder later to go back to school, but you will miss out on a multitude of opportunities to open your life up in ways you haven’t imagined yet that you are ready for right now. Don’t forget this very important thing: you can have it all, everything you truly desire. But make your decisions as carefully as you can. It sounds like you have a strong vision for your pole life and you can create that life. But a college education, even if you pursue it out of respect for your parents’ wishes, will never put you at a disadvantage.. it can only help you. Do both…life is long and you can have everything if you’re smart about it.
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Don’t forget Kitty, Darlin, Carmen, Harmony, Bella, and Willow! Guaranteed actual stripper names.
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I have very strong and large hands and my 50 is really too big for me. I am still struggling with one-handed spins. I would prefer a 45 or even smaller, but I bolted mine into concrete with anchors so I guess the 50 stays!
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I recently got involved in a very fast close friendship with a girl who is very funny and a riot to be around. But it quickly became apparent that she is profoundly self centered and untrustworthy. I initially was hurt by some of her actions, but I also understood her incapacity for thinking much about other people, and realized she had no idea she’d caused me pain. I chose to not tell her the effect of her behavior. She’s 49 and unlikely to change, as she is still terribly immature. I instead decided to love her for what she can reliably bring, which is laughter. I can’t rely on her to tell the truth, to show up, or to stop and think of the needs of others. But I can rely on her to make me laugh, so I choose to find her precious in that way. My emotional distance from her now is just for me, she doesn’t perceive it and I don’t need her to. I can love her as she is. But should she ever be purposefully hurtful, I would have to cut her off. I just relate this story because when we can perceive the shortcomings of another and yet still salvage the good, then everybody wins. Unfortunately there are indeed people who are too toxic to salvage. The trick is knowing where the line gets crossed.
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I like the heels…but did your toes hang off the front? I have narrowish feet and long toes and I hate how they hang over the edge and pinch. So ugly. But I’m willing to try again, especially since these are used maybe they’re softer.
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I’ve actually flown into several different countries for one night just to see performances of Swan Lake. I’ve seen incredible productions and the most beautiful ballerinas on earth. But I never imagined that what I just saw was humanly possible. Tchaikovsky would be astounded, thrilled, and brought to tears like I just was. THANK YOU for sharing this.
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I bought this very pole and I can’t even find where the finish is supposed to be defective! It’s super grippy and spin mode is so fast and flawless you have to be careful not to fly out the window. Very solid mounts too, and also it’s a mom and pop shop with excellent customer service. My only complaint is had I known better I’d have preferred a 45 mom but at the time they just had 50mm. But it’s permanently mounted into concrete so it’s staying put lol…have no fears about buying this pole in terms of quality though, it’s great.
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As a massage therapist I can’t tell you how many clients I treat in recovery from hot yoga-related injuries. The heat allows for greater stretching of tissues than they should be allowed to stretch, and of course slipping on sweaty mats also does damage. Bikram in particular has a dogmatic approach that in my view contradicts the gentle, receptive, yin-focus yoga is supposed to engender, and in fact has a violent and antagonistic regard for an individual body’s limitations. None of my personal objections matter if a person enjoys this kind of yoga and engages in it carefully, and I applaud whatever anyone likes. That said, when clients ask me about it, I honestly explain my concerns and hopefully help prevent injury, via awareness, should they pursue this practice. As an aside, I also do not practice Thai yoga massage, which is a recognized and valued therapeutic modality, because only a small segment of the population has joints that can tolerate it safely. The main thing to be aware of is one’s ego, which overrules the sense of what our bodies can or cannot do at any specific time. To me, the very fact of hating doing something just for the sake of feeling great once it’s done is a red flag. To me that’s ego pushing the body beyond its capacity and past its needs. Sorry for the diatribe but I just hate to see those injuries sustained from what should be a practice that loves and honors the body rather than defies it.
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I have under-the-muscle implants also and while my strength isn’t affected, that weird pulling up with any pec contraction is just what happens. It does look pretty ugly but I consider it a small price to pay for having otherwise gorgeous boobies.
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I don’t have any pole ocd-isms, but before I leave the house I have to touch each burner on the stove and say “off, off, off, off” even if I never turned it on that day! I have a 45 mile drive to work and I’ve actually stopped halfway and sped back home to do this in case I forgot.
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One of the best things to ever happen to me was to rent from a psycho landlady who stalked me, read my mail, snooped in the apartment when I wasn’t there, and walked outside past my windows buck naked while I tried to eat breakfast. Because of her, I vowed never to rent again, and I put my energies to buying my own house, which I did a year ago. Weird unpleasant predicaments are often the best means by which to prod us forward to better things in life. Good luck!
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Wow! That’s too awesome! My bf often shows me amazing videos of gorgeous muscular women doing incredible things on the pole that make me feel a little less than, though that’s not his intention and he cheers the least tiny move I accomplish. I just sent him this clip so he can see it’s something to which he might aspire too. He does a spin or hold and gives up, saying he could never do even the little that I can, though he’s an ox with muscle! Thanks for the inspiration for a newbie poling couple!
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Being in the health professions myself, and seeing the gross that can accompany the physical self, I instead feel so grateful that right now at least, all my parts are intact and in good working order. Health and wholeness are gifts we may be forced to lose at any time. Don’t waste time that could be spent cherishing your own sexy, whole, healthy body now, while you can enjoy and express it. The time will come for each of us when the beautiful pole days will be but a wistful memory, because of age, sickness, or injury. Don’t lose sight of the beautiful while you have it. Feel for others; have compassion for their suffering; but let it remain their own so it doesn’t mar the celebration of what you yourself have, while you have it.
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The greatest love of my life was my ornery, intractable, pain in the ass bulldog named Spike. He led an amazing life traveling around the world with me, he gave me so much love and aggravation…he was my everything. His health began to fail when he was nearly 13. He suffered a ruptured spleen but was somehow still happy, had a huge appetite, and chewed his toys. Then he began to have little strokes which impaired his gait. The vet said to listen to Spike, that he would tell me when it was time. I remember watching him every day as he began to pee on the floor, or fall over, wondering if I was missing his message. Even as he diminished, I didn’t believe he was ready, he was still so happy…still so Spike. Nearly a year passed of watching his decline, and finally he was diagnosed with cancer. The vet still said Spike would tell us when he was ready. Then a week later he fell over and seized… I ran to cradle him, to comfort my precious seizing best friend…and as I held him he looked into my eyes and at last I knew he was telling me it was time. It was unmistakable, and miraculous really. We rushed him to the vet, who gave him Valium first. Then we held him in our arms and kissed his face and told him how much we loved him, and gently, surrounded by our love, he passed. I’ve never cried like I did then. But I’ll forever be grateful to the vet who told us to listen to Spike’s own decision, and for the chance to cradle my beloved baby as he left us.