[Runemist34]

It looks fantastic, Veena! Congratulations on your very first book! (And, yes, this is a BOOK)

[Runemist34]

That’s the same as how I felt! I’m happier knowing that baking is a great hobby that I love to engage in, than a potential career I never explored.
I really hope that the exploration and challenge of dance and seeing if it can be your career is a really rewarding one, no matter what happens! I’m sure you’ll learn a lot, and that’s what it’s all about!

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
I just want to add a note of caution, but not because I think you shouldn’t go with it. It’s because I’ve been there.
I love baking. I love it a lot, and I explore and learn all the time how to make more complicated and enjoyable things. I have my own piping bag and make simple designs on cakes, I take requests for people’s birthdays for their birthday cake. I’m getting an ice cream maker and hoping to use that to make ice cream cake, too!
However, when I considered making it my career, I took on two paid commissions for cakes. That was the most stressful baking I’ve ever done!
I come to bake in order to relax and enjoy myself, to be creative. When I’m doing something for a birthday, I know that people aren’t necessarily expecting something spectacular- they know this is something I do for free! So, when I pull out something that looks great, they’re super happy. But, doing it for money totally changed everything, and I was stressed, and unhappy. I didn’t feel like I had the chance to share and explore!

So, I DO think that you should jump in and explore your possibilities! Definitely take the time to follow different avenues! Just be aware of your own responses, and take your intuition seriously!

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
I’m so sorry to hear about your dog- that is horrible. I’m glad to hear you’ve got some money to help, and that things seemed to work out that way.
However, I understand it’s also frustrating on the pole dancing front! Poles can be quite expensive, and even though you only need one, sometimes getting it is tough.
You can always check out Craislist or Ebay or Kijiji, though I would say to be careful about buying knockoffs! Some people have gotten excellent deals, though, and if you check back often, I’m sure you can find something that fits your budget. Some patience and tenacity, and I’m sure you can find something that works!

Congrats, by the way, on being in excellent shape, and not allowing your challenges to dampen your enthusiasm and spirit! You have impressive dedication 🙂
Some other skills you can work on, in the mean time, if you get bored, could be things like handstands, or even getting a pull up bar and trying tilting your body forward and back while holding yourself up with your arms. These would really help in your future pole dancing!
Good luck!

[Runemist34]

Hi there!
I live in a pretty humid climate, and find that my powder coated pole is doing a great job 😉 Though, during the summer, stickiness is something of an issue. I’ve come off the pole with burnin’ skin before! I have not, however, had a single issue with grip once the pole is warm, even during the winter!
I’ve also heard great things about brass, and I’m sure some of the other ladies can weigh in with their own experiences!

[Runemist34]

Hey Lisandra!
I’m really sorry to hear you had such a horrible experience. I would absolutely be offended if anyone said such things to me, or reacted like that! It’s absolutely not okay to make judgements about people’s weight or background.
While, yes, much of the Pole community is very welcoming and accepting (this place, for me, has been amazing for both of those), it is growing, and by growing it’s also having some pains. People who have very specific judgements of other people and what they do is one of the challenges that we have to accept is going to happen as pole dancing becomes more mainstream. There was recently some drama about a move that Felix Cane created (called the Spatchcock) which someone else in the pole community looked like a chicken. It wasn’t the best moment for the community, and seemed to divide people quite a lot (didn’t see much, if anything, here).

So, I’m just going to put a couple of things down that we’ve seen around here. First, inverting during an introductory class sounds extremely dangerous to me! Most people begin inverting at around 6 months of very consistent pole work, and some do not master it for years. It doesn’t matter how skinny or fat you are, if you don’t have the muscle for it, and you don’t know how the move works, serious injury is extremely likely!
I’m sorry to hear that there are pole studios out there with such unsafe and discriminatory practices.
Second, pole dancing at home only is perfectly viable! The lessons here on Studio Veena are excellent, and I’ve been using them for years. I have not, granted, been very consistent with my practice of pole dancing, but I’m getting better, and through being more consistent at home, I’m getting stronger! I have no studios in my town for pole dancing, so this is my only option… and it works well!
Third, your weight has very little to do with your ability to pole dance. There are many women who are beautiful, graceful, and strong on the pole, and most would describe them as “fat.” There are also women who are very thin, but do not have the strength to execute many moves. Your weight has little to do with skill and strength. Larger people face different challenges, and smaller people also face different challenges!

So, I would say that the pole studio you tried was not a great experience, and you probably should not go back to them. You tried, and I think you are very brave for doing so! But, they didn’t treat you properly and have obviously dangerous ideas of what we can do on the pole early on. Not safe, not nice!

But, please keep at it! We welcome EVERYONE here, and the support here for keeping up a steady practice, troubleshooting moves, and getting fit and strong are excellent. Veena is always around to answer any lesson questions and other things.
Even if you aren’t into online lessons here, I hope you keep pole dancing!

[Runemist34]

Possible that the company has disappeared, as this post was started about 5 years ago!
I looked over the weight limit for my current lil mynx, and it says up to 250 lbs, so they do seem to be making them stronger.
I weigh about 200 lbs and it works just fine for me! No wobbling, bending, or movement of any kind.

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
I’m also on an island with very little to offer for pole studios, so this is also where I come 🙂 I neglected my left side for a while (and still sort of do, but I’m getting better) and when I actually tried to practice my basic dance moves on the left, I was “left” feeling uncoordinated and weird.
So, here’s what I realized: I’m training a part of me that isn’t just not used to pole dancing, but it’s not used to ANYTHING! My left side is often neglected during the day as well. I’ve trained the right side to write well, to catch falling objects, to shake my instant breakfast, to brush my teeth… but the left hasn’t had the benefit of my consistent teaching! It’s a little feeble, and confused.
So, give yourself a bit of room to relax, and feel the flow. Slow down and get in touch with your body, and allow your left side to have it’s quirks, too! The right side you’ll find has different ideas; you’ll be doing a spin and think “Hmm, why do I put my foot that way on this side, but not the other side?” And that is the interesting thing about training both. Each one will do it’s own thing, even if you’re doing the same move.
Veena’s conditioning and strength training really helped me a lot with balancing out both sides. Patience and consistency, too!
Good luck! You’ll get there!

[Runemist34]

Feeling like this thread needs a good ‘ol ressurection! So let’s do it!
I do not currently have pictures (maybe later tonight? Or tomorrow morning!), but I feel I’m closer to my left and right side splits than ever! I can see my foot when I turn my head a bit while stretching… it’s a little weird! I feel like my legs are SO LONG when I’m stretching for the splits!
My middle splits are still a bit ornery, but I’m working on it, being patient!
I don’t know that I’ll have my splits by the end of the year… but I am DEFINITELY much closer than I have ever been, in my whole life!
How’s everyone else doing??

[Runemist34]

Hey Dante!
There are a few people (women, mostly) here who have had their work find out… I’d say, mixed results! However, it’s a little bit different when women are discovered than, I think, men being discovered. The stigma around women and pole dance is that it’s a sexual thing, and our society doesn’t like to admit that women can be sexual, and motherly, and professional… well, anyways! I’m not sure how a workplace would react to a man coming out as a pole dancer. Other gymnastics I could see being taken well (there are men doing gymnastics on the olympics, for goodness sake!), but pole has that “stripper” stigma still attached and hanging on.

As for dancing incognito, I would say that a mask might help a lot! Also, putting a lot of makeup around the eyes, distorting your features (making your eyes look bigger, or changing their shape, drawing attention to various parts of your face), playing around with shadow and lighting (also known as contouring) and colour, could all help to transform you on stage! Interestingly, drag queens are extremely good at this, and you could look up some ideas on Youtube. Getting a professional to do your makeup would also be a good one!
A good stage name also goes a long way to keeping your superhero identity separate from your secret, civilian identity 😉

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
Spinning pole is something you might want to work with when you’re a lot more comfortable with pole dancing, and stronger, so that you’re better able to deal with the force of the pole moving, as well as not getting overly ill from the movement!
I think most people start spinning pole around the Intermediate level.
And yes, all moves for everything ever should always be trained on both sides!

[Runemist34]

This one interests me! My booty was one of the reasons I started running (have you SEEN that runner’s butt?), but I’ve also found that there are some muscles I just don’t use much.
I have what I call an “english butt,” which is to say, it’s sort of flat on the sides? So, I had to find some exercises that worked other muscles within that area than just the main one- that is, I needed to work the Medius and Minimus, not just the Maximus!
So, I found that doing side-squats (in which you step far to the side, and then squat down on that leg, with the other leg reaching straight out, and alternate) REALLY worked muscles in there that I had never found before! Super helpful, but try not to overdo it.
Also, there are many different workout routines, videos, and even whole regiments focused on the butt. I acquired “Brazil Beach Butt” some years back. It’s terribly funny, but I imagine it’s also very effective! I haven’t actually tried it… because, well, I haven’t had that much time to dedicate to just my butt!

I hope you find your way to a butt you can be proud of! And remember: Butt or not, you’re still super hot!

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
Yes, there are very many people who have these sorts of frustrations, myself included. I’m not a small person- I joke sometimes that, due to genetics, I’m basically a Celtic Warrior. I can barely fit into a lot of the bathroom stalls these days!
It’s often difficult to tell how tall or large some ladies are when they’re up on stage with a pole, because we have nothing to really compare them to. As far as I recall, Alethea Austin isn’t a little person, either!

Yes, our larger size will hinder us in some ways, but it will also allow us to have greater strength in general. Should any of us larger polers need to tow a car with just a rope and ourselves, I think we’d be a lot better equipped than someone of even Veena’s size, as tall as she may be!
I see it like this: Smaller people are like F1 cars, they go fast and they go fast all the time! They’re quick and nimble, crafty and cute, and they get to awesome places in fitness quicker than we do. However, we’re more like big trucks: We have a lot more stature, we might get there slower, but a light breeze or small bump from another car or truck won’t knock us over, we just keep going. We’re tougher, and can haul a lot more weight around than they can.
It’s a very “Top Gear” analogy, I realize, but… it helps 😉

It DOES sound like you’ve hit a bit of a plateu with strength, which is something everyone has to deal with! It can be really frustrating to reach a point in your strength and feel like you can’t get any further, and it can also be very easy to blame it on something we can’t control; stature, time, even some arbitrary limitation on our strength, as if we’ve somehow reached the “end of the line.”
From what I’ve noticed, some cross-training can be very helpful with these things. Challenging your muscled to work in different ways, like lifting weights or trying yoga or pilates instead for a week, or just adding it into your routine for a little bit.
Also, many people will break through plateus if they stop pushing so hard, and work on the moves they know, but haven’t yet perfected. You’re still working your muscles and asking things of them, but by allowing yourself that tiny step away from moving constantly forward, you may find that you take a huge leap in the long run!

Good luck, and remember- you might be a little slower getting there, but you’ll get there and you’ll be tough and awesome by then!

[Runemist34]

I have heard the story a few times, where pole dancers are linked to being seedy, slutty, of “loose morals” and all the like. The stories are becoming fewer, but they do still exist.
I think that many people don’t understand learning a “skill” simply to learn it. It’s like me with my harp: I learn to play because I like it, not because I want to perform music on stage! So, when you talk about learning to pole dance, and that you love it, people automatically assume that you would like to put those skills and that passion to work for you, and thus, Strip club. They often don’t realize that pole dancing is a very small part of the strip club job, and that many of the tricks and strength we’re learning will go to less than half of our potential stripper wage.
Also, you’re coming up against some very old ideas of “how women should act,” and also some relatively new ones. It’s only been recently, in terms of society, that women are in the workplace, and most of us are expected to act and dress closely to our male counterparts. We’re supposed to feel empowered by “doing a good job,” and earning lots of money, we’re supposed to feel powerful, assertive, strong. These are things often associated with male-ness (and I definitely don’t agree with it).
However, a woman who is exploring her sexuality should do so behind closed doors! This comes out in a huge amount of situations. Girl’s wearing too short a skirt? We talk about it, and go “Ooh, she’s slutty!” Woman is flirting with a co-worker? Well, we talk about that, too, and call her something like the “office bicycle.” A woman who even talks about being sexual with her life-partner is taboo, because sex is something we consider extremely private. So private, in fact, that we very rarely educate our children about it properly.
So, people associate sexuality with pole dancing, and also with strippers. Obvious sexual pleasure taken by a woman, or a woman who is obviously sexually charged or empowered, is often referred to as a slut. Thus, we assume that strippers are all indiscriminately having sex with many guys, and “don’t respect their bodies” (because if you did, you’d act like a “proper woman” and keep that sh*t to yourself!).
So, the ladies like us who are learning pole dancing are considered to be exploring our sexuality, and are thus not acting like the masculinized idea of working women, or the mother-figure of a mom at home, or the silly teenager. We have no other box to be put into other than slutty.

We are building another box to be put into, we are creating a new label, as women, all over the world. I know thousands of women who are creating this empowered, sexual, incredible label that we can all be proud to have and happy to be inside of, because it is more freeing than being “unlabeled” or having others stick us with their closed views of what we should be.

So, keep at it. We’re fighting an amazing battle, and insults are only just one weapon that others are using against us.

[Runemist34]

Hey Carly!
First, welcome to Studio Veena! Always happy to see new polers around here 🙂
I’m really shocked to hear that you’re working on things like Butterfly and Flatline scorpio after 2 months of pole dancing!! Have you got a lot of dance or fitness background? It’s extremely rare to hear of someone doing those things so quickly into the journey!
While I don’t have any specific ideas on how to nail the transition, I can think of some general things to ask: Do you have your flatline scorpio down super well? Is your butterfly solid?
There are some moves and transitions that we get, and then lose, and I’ve seen it happen a few times around here where people will lose things only to give them a total rest… and then they come back! This is often because of overtraining. If you’re working the same muscles a lot with other moves, or trying the move you want too much, your muscles can become tired and weak, and you’ll find that it just doesn’t work anymore. There isn’t necessarily any soreness or noticeable fatigue involved, you just “lose the move.”

So, perhaps instead of banging your head against this particular wall, you could ease off it, find another one to work on, and then come back in a couple of weeks!