[Runemist34]

Hey!
I looked it up, and it seems similar to the kind of thing I experience with my own shoulder (I have A/C tendon damage). I have pain occasionally, now, and I’m still working on proper alignment and posture with that shoulder. It’s been a long, long time for me.
I’m curious, though, what kinds of things did you do with the physical therapist?
From what I read, there should have been at least 4-6 weeks of strengthening to get your shoulder back to being able to move correctly, though perhaps longer for proper rehabilitation, with a lot of work on rotator cuffs and other shoulder stabilizers. This, presumeably, should have helped with your clicking, as well as the pain.
However, if the inflammation doesn’t go down at all, it would be really difficult to work with that area at all, so it did also state that the first order of business is to reduce inflammation. Either ice, anti-inflammatory medication, or cortisol injections. Or, y’know, all three.
Continuing with your rotator cuff exercises at home, if you have them, might be a thing you have to do for a long time. I know I should be doing them, and I should be doing them for a *long time*.

I can understand why the dr’s wouldn’t want to do surgery on that, though. The recovery time would be long, and it’s possible your shoulder would never be the same afterward. Shoulders are difficult things.

[Runemist34]

My personal account is @runemist34, and it’s not all pole dance… but I’m trying to add more pole dance in! It’s just hard because I don’t have a lot of good pictures or footage yet 😉

[Runemist34]

Hey Nyxed!
I also have anxiety, and sometimes, I have chronic pain, too. It sucks! And I’m so glad you managed to push yourself through this first part of the pole journey, and found that it clicks for you!
Interestingly, we always talk about “goals,” like they’re something that PULLS you forward- as in, something that is ahead of you in time, that makes you work toward it.
However, it sounds like you experienced something different. The PUSH, which I think of when we get curious and “see what we can do.” Instead of looking toward the awesome future, we’re instead looking back and comparing our progress to what we could (or could not) do before, and finding that a positive experience.
To accomplish things, I believe we need both. The push and pull of a lifestyle, even if it isn’t every day or everything you think about, is the thing that keeps us going back.
When I was training for my 10k run the first time, it was the Push to get better than I was doing before, and the Pull of my actual event coming up! They worked together to keep me going, and that is probably the ONLY reason I actually did the thing.

As for pole goals, I would encourage you to think about what you like looking at when you seek out other pole dancers, and also, why you like looking at it! If you love to watch that slow, slinky, sexy stuff, then why? Are you amazed by their movements, their flow, their bodies? Is it the control they have when they do actually execute those big “power moves”?
Or, do you love watching the tricksters? Is it because they are so strong? Do you love the flips, the flags, and the feats of strength? Do you love how they just throw themselves in and out of so many moves, and it all seems crazy, but you know they’ve worked on it for months?

I find that what I like to look at is what I would like to see in myself. Knowing the why of something gives you a really great direction. If you love the control, the strength, and the flow, then you can work on those things! If you love the flips, get into flips! If you love all the booty shakin, then do some booty and don’t mind all the new Instagram trend wandering around!

Good luck!
And don’t forget… you can change your mind, if you want, too 😉

[Runemist34]

I checked it out, and while not what I was thinking, it is adorable and I love it!
I looked up the Cha cha basic step, too, and it’s… far too basic. Not quite what I was thinking?

What I have written down (super super rudimentary argh!) is this:
Either: One big step, cross foot behind, and then swap feet.
Or: One big step, cross foot behind, bring feet aligned, and then cross in front.
The intention is to always change which foot is being moved.
A few other notes is that it looks like a quick change of feet after one big step across the pole in order to turn around.
I was also shown this as the “big step” being a step around, which at the end you would then cross your foot behind the one that actually stepped around, and then two steps to come out.

I’m still practicing it, anyways!
I have like, a couple of short video examples that Tammy did for us, but it’s so hard to tell what she’s doing with her feet, because she’s so fast at it! I’m going to try to dive in and dissect it further, though.
I’ll try to put up a video for you guys, when and if I get it figured out!!

[Runemist34]

Silver Sylph it might be! I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen anyone do it, other than Tammy when she was teaching us. It flows so well I completely haven’t noticed it!
I’ll see if I can find something about Cleo doing it 😉

[Runemist34]

I’ve looked up lots of tutorials for it, and watched a lot…
But the way I learned it, it was a forward step, not a side step. It was used to move around the pole similar to walking forward or back, to change direction, or to enter or exit moves.
While I can do it moving side to side, I was hoping someone would be able to translate or explain it to me going forward… because I do NOT understand how to make it travel forward and back!

[Runemist34]

Hi Ciaosara!
So, there’s this thing that happens with pole dance, as with a lot of other fitness and similar things…
The need to “keep up,” or to be just like everyone else. It’s a form of self-judgement that will just ruin your happiness.
I started pole dancing 9-ish years ago. I wasn’t really consistent, but all of my friends and everyone around me started inverting WAY before I was close to it. They kept doing it, and I kept… not doing it.
Even now, I started really trying to be consistent. I started taking classes, lifting weights, lots and lots of things! I’m much stronger than I used to be…
But I still can’t invert well, or often, or on both sides. I struggle with it a lot.

So, in order to get to your invert, you’re going to have to get uncomfortable. You’ll have to take the classes and keep plugging away at it, even as the people in the classes change and move on, over and over, and you’re still there. You’re going to have to get uncomfortable with your challenges, with your body, and with your own self-judgement.
However, it does NOT mean you can’t pole dance! There are SO MANY other things you can learn. You could stay grounded, and learn the millions of beautiful, sexy, fun moves that are based on the ground or the floor. You could climb the pole and remain mostly upright, because there are lots of moves to be had in that position, too!
Good examples: I’m working on my exotic dance right now, as well as getting back to my Cross Knee Release, with hope to get to the Cross Ankle release (they’re also called laybacks). I could work on my Teddy hold, my Figurehead (or Hood Ornament, depending on where you’re from), my Apprentice. I could also do so many spins!
And, all of these things create strength, grace, and skill that will bring me closer to the invert, too.

So, please try not to feel discouraged. I know it’s frustrating, I know it’s hard to have so many people move on from where you are, and to not move on with them. But, you’re still valid as a pole dancer, even if you never, ever do a basic invert. You’re still amazing.

[Runemist34]

Hi nyxed!
Lap dance, as with most exotic dance, can be a little weird to put into a routine, because there are so few “moves” used, and yet you can string them along for a whole three minutes!
With exotic pole, a lot of the moves are sort of… “filler,” so things like hip circles to show off, slow bows, and hair whips, as well as a lot of the leg stuff done on the ground, just aren’t really written down as “moves,” but they’re the majority of the things you do!
I don’t know of any specific examples for *these* moves, but there are lots of examples on Youtube to give you an idea of how a lap dance can be done.
Just remember to take it really, really slowly! As my studio instructor says, “No one likes a frantic stripper!” 😉
Good luck, and just remember to relax! You’re allowed to not know and to flounder while you figure it out. Just keep playing!

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
So, when you said you get into your elbowstand, you said you press into it. With the handstand, it sounds like you’re kicking up, which would create quite a bit more momentum! The control needed to keep that momentum from taking you all the way over is really difficult to achieve without a LOT of practice!
My suggestions would be to slowly work on your freestanding elbowstand, and then for handstands, for now use a wall or the pole behind you, so you can’t go all the way over! That will help you figure out where your balance should be, and how hard you need to kick up, until you’re ready to press up into your handstand.

And it’s super exciting to hear about your inverted crucifix! That one was super hard for me, too! I have a lot of anxiety about the hold in that move, and facing straight down to the ground. I’m glad you didn’t give up! There is so much more you can do!

[Runemist34]

Strangefox, I’m in Canada, too 😉 Shipping here is horrible!
And, sadly, I am too busty for literally any bra shop that doesn’t cater to umm… “specialty” needs. I don’t even glance at La Senza or La Vie en Rose anymore. Walmart is a joke, too. They do try, but… they always manage to get me into something terrible lol 😉
I’m surprised Bad Kitty had such a long shipping time! I had my wedding dress shipped here in less than a week, so I would expect a couple of tops to be fine!

Thanks for your reviews and recommendations, everyone! I really appreciate it. I wish there were more options out there for those of us with more bust, more booty, or just… More!

[Runemist34]

Yayo: I am very busty, actually, and I did e-mail them a while ago. They pointed me toward a few of their tops, and indicated that these ones would probably work… but as always, I am quite wary. Having a medium waist and a large/x-large bust makes things complicated, especially in an industry that seems to expect you will, inevitably, have a tiny chest. Which frankly, will never happen for me!
So, I’m still wary but… sometimes I think I’d like to try it.
Nat: I had no idea they had moved production! That makes things a little different for my decision-making process.

If either of you are interested in tops which are similarly priced, I found a UK-based site called Wink, and they will do “bespoke” for you for an extra 5 pound- which means they’ll make it to fit you. They told me that I could easily ask for that, give them my measurements in the “bespoke colour” area, and they’ll make me a top with a medium waistband, and large bust area. They’re not too bad looking, either 🙂 I haven’t checked their shipping yet, though.

Ah, the search for a good pole top for busty ladies continues… 😉

[Runemist34]

I’ve tried a few different ones, and honestly, I just like to go on my own! I find most other people either count too fast, too slow, or include moves I simply cannot achieve or be in comfortably.
I started doing yoga a while ago, and that really helped. I find yoga to be an easy, happy medium that keeps me occupied and stretches places that basically nothing else does.
I also find stretching in my own way allows me some freedom, in case I need to avoid, or focus on, a certain area that day (due to soreness, overstretching, or general discomfort).
What keeps me going is… I just stick it at the end of all my training. Lift weights in the gym? Time for stretching. Pole dance? Stretching after! Running for 30 minutes? Stretch, and then go for a shower.
By attaching it to something else I’m already doing, it takes the “motivation” out of it, which means you don’t need to force yourself to do it. That way, it also takes the need for “progress” out of it- you’re stretching because you worked out, not because you want something.
Flexibility takes lots of time, and certain things take different amounts of time. It’s also not a linear path, you’ll feel like you make lots of progress, take a day or two off, and then suddenly it’s all gone! Or, maybe you stretch a bit too much one day, and then you’re too sore the next.

So, be patient! It takes the time it takes.

Also, if you REALLY want a DVD, I found Felix Can’es flexibility DVD to be the best I tried (and also the best of her DVD set), but it’s a bit hard to follow as she’s not strong on auditory cues 😉

[Runemist34]

I actually do a lot of strength training at the gym- I work out there with my Mum, 3 days a week. No matter what else we do there, core training *always* comes at the end! I have to say, it’s made a huge difference. I’m certain I could stand to bump it up a little more, but even 3 days a week, one exercise each time, has been great. It doesn’t have to take long to make a difference 😉
I attribute the fact that I haven’t actually lost anything I learned from the studio last year to the strength training. It’s been huge for me!
I will check out Veena’s app, though. It’s possible it might be enough to even just get me going, because… well, sometimes (often, let’s be honest) it’s a challenge for me to get going.

Also, core work can really suck at the beginning. It used to make me feel sick to my stomach! But it does get easier. I’m still not good at planks (Mum’s at two minutes and twenty seconds, I’m still struggling at one minute!), but I’m pretty good at everything else!

[Runemist34]

Veena, I see what you’re saying, and also no I didn’t know the app was so cheap! That’s pretty awesome 🙂 I do a lot of strength training in the gym, but doing it at home, and following a rigid program, is… sadly, very boring for me. I need some kind of excitement! That’s why I’m struggling. It’s a difficult balance.

StrangeFox, thank you! I was thinking about 3 moves to work on, but I also really like the idea of having a “feel good” move. I forget that stuff sometimes!

[Runemist34]

Hey Nyxed!
Sadly, I don’t have money for a subscription right now, so following the takeoff’s aren’t possible for the time.
I also find working on a single move extremely boring- I tend to enjoy mixing it up, and thus keeping the moves a little bit more novel for a while. It helps with my attention! However, doing ALL the move stuff seems to be a bit too much. I also get frustrated- I am strong in some ways, and not very strong in others, so for a lot of other people, they think I should be able to do something, when I cannot. This is why I often prefer to work out in a way that I can control (even though I know it comes with pitfalls, such as the one at hand, as well as motivation).
I am always really good about rest days, though! With as many physical hobbies as I have, I’m really particular about my rest days being actual REST days 😉
Thank you for the suggestion, though! 30 days is actually a good amount of time to practice something. Perhaps I will try that in my own way 🙂