Saeth
Forum Replies Created
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I can’t really suggest anything as I’ve only used one product so far however I do want to say it should get better over time. When I first started out I used to sweat terribly because I was unfit and generally very weak. I used to slather on the liquid chalk and then keep doing it multiple times throughout the class. I was a walking chalk monster. Now it’s so much better though I’m still more sweaty than not. As you get stronger your grip will also strengthen enough to help you grip through the sweat, if that makes sense. I’d recommend buying a little hand towel you can take with you to wipe yourself off and the pole too.
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I’d wait hun. I don’t have this piercing, I have labret, nostril, lobes, however some basic principles apply to all piercings.
1) It takes a lot of energy for your body to heal a piercing. It should be treated as if it’s a minor surgery wound. If I remember right it’s 3 months for a Christina. Seeing as your body will be under a lot of stress during training (mental and physical), it would be unwise to mix a piercing with this. Recover fully, then get it done. Stress can slow healing down by as much as 40%.
2) It’s very easy to think that it should heal fine but sometimes all it takes is one knock and then the healing can be set back. For this reason, if I knew I had to do something stressful coming up just after a healing period, I would get it done earlier, or wait. I allow an extra two weeks on top of the base healing time for all my piercings also to allow for set backs.
3) If you do get a piercing during a stressful period, then it’ll require more aftercare and salt soaks and even this may not prevent problems.
As for time off, I would give it a week and then carefully consider my chances of knocking it on the pole. It may be you have to scale your moves down a bit and do things that are more gentle or less risky for “crotch knocks” as I call them lol. I guess some slide moves could be at risk of knocking it too, or ultra flexy ones involving the leg. It’s hard, it’s not like I’ve sat there and thought “well I wonder how this particular area is affected?” lol. I would be wary of clothes pulling on it.
I can’t really fully answer how long you should leave poling after getting it done, if at all. If it is possible to pole with it, you may need to consider doing more salt soaks before a session, and a quick rinse after. Sweat and crusties can irritate the wound from being pushed into the piercing though. I know you can get a sea salt spray, maybe that would be useful to carry with you?
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Your level is a lot higher than mine, Tropical, so I don’t feel I can give much advice. If you’re doing a show case this does obviously add some time pressure. If it were me, I’d find a couple of things I can pull off fairly comfortably right now and drill them so I’m ready for the day. Sometimes embracing simplicity is often a good step. It can be very easy to think of doing big flashy moves but “lesser” stuff can look fantastic when done well and with confidence. Same with holding things for a bit longer rather than knocking out move after move. I’m sure you know that already though 😛
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I’m not at the point where I can do this while spinning atm however I have just started working on exiting while holding a V. It is very hard work! I find grace is often connected to our conditioning levels according to the move. I was surprised at how much exiting in a V hit my upper body and core. It takes a lot of effort to maintain a controlled descent. I managed to land one quite well and even though that was higher up on the pole, I then done a back bend and slowly straightened up. It flowed so it looked pretty.
When you say exiting do you mean specifically without coming down onto the floor, does that make sense? Like V’ing out? Or do you also mean things like basic dismount/snake, handstands out? Or both? Currently I’m working on handstand out, basic dismount. I’ll also keep one ankle on the pole and extend a leg. It’s a bit like a on the floor Gemini. I’ll also do a V or even a pike once my back is on the floor and I’ve detached from the pole. Then I’ll often roll onto my belly and do a flip split or reverse drive. At this point I can start standing.
Not sure if that’s of any help!
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I know this feeling all too well! Reducing sugar for me was a multiple year journey. The biggest break through was when I went paelo for 2 years, that helped a lot, but not fully. Eventually my sugar cravings actually got worse and it turned out my body needs more carbs. However that journey me taught me I could manage with so much lower levels of sugar.
For me what worked was so very gradually cutting it back. I used to have 2 sugars in my tea. I cut it back by 1/8 each time over months. Lots of juice in drinks, so I scaled that back too. I set treat days for myself (twice a month, anything more starts the cravings again!) and refuse to buy anything outside of these days. There are no snacks in my house besides oranges and berries. Now, I’m no angel, I do sometimes break these rules, especially when stressed or unhappy however it’s limited my sugar nomming hugely. When I do it’s pretty bad I have to say. I’m talking 3 chocolate bars, a sweet drink, crisps! But my energy levels are better and more stable and I just don’t feel so “meh” since reducing sugar as a lifestyle thing. I find when I fall off the wagon, my food doesn’t taste sweet enough. When this happens I do a “sugar reset”. Drink nothing but water and eat savoury meals and limited amounts of fruit for a number of weeks and avoid all junk, savoury or not. That sets me right again and food tastes sweet enough without eating lots of junk.
Sometimes sugar cravings can be a sign of not enough carbs though that often isn’t common for most people. It can also be a sign of an imbalanced gut flora because there’s more bad bugs in the stomach than good. Guess what they like? Sugar! Sweet food can be a comfort/emotional thing. My point is what helps another will not help the next. I think it’s important to get to the reasons why you crave sugar and when. Keeping a dairy can help. Then like any addiction, you have to want to change and start the journey of that change. It’s not an overnight thing for most.
Not sure if that’ll be of any help or not, it’s just my experience 🙂
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Shadow, as has become apparent, you are not alone. Depression is a very common problem (yes, even for your age group!) and the stigma that surrounds it still is absolutely ridiculous. I have experienced many types of depression: situational, hormonal, chemical and seasonal. It runs in the family.
Depression is highly personal, what is right for one can be absolutely wrong for another. We also have different patterns to our depression. For me ensuring I stick to a basic routine of meeting my basic needs helps prevent me from spiraling down. I’ve also learnt that being inactive while in a bad depressive attack doesn’t help me. It makes it so much worse. I have to mentally yell and scream at myself to get out of the chair. Even if I do something as mundane as folding washing, it helps. Eating meals on time, getting out of bed, drinking enough water, it helps. It’s tiny tiny things. Maybe it’s just me but I beat myself up more when depressed so by doing these things I have less to beat myself up over!
I second what Runemist said about “inviting it in”. Depression is exhausting, fighting it even more so. I can do things to help not make it worse because let’s face it, lying in bed while the house is a pig sty isn’t contributing to a positive mental state lol, but the depression is still there. So, I remind myself it will get at least a bit better at some point and just ride this wave and it’ll die out when it is so inclined. I can help it along by having a structured routine, making myself do things I know I normally enjoy (maybe to a lesser degree), and a healthy sleep routine. It’s taken me many years to draw up a plan of “self care” which works for me. I’ve accepted that sometimes I can be active and still not feel better however it passes the time which is helpful. It’s a small victory but a victory it still is.
Poling has proved to be my saviour mentally, even though it takes a heavy toll on my health condition. Even if I don’t feel better after, I’m having to focus so entirely on what I’m doing I’m distracted from thinking, “I’m hurting so much right now.” Physical activity can definitely give you a boost and poling is empowering which is good when you feel like this. I find music can affect my mood too. Sometimes I’m so miserable and hurting I just blast out the saddest songs and just embrace it. It still surprises me how therapeutic that can be! It’s a bit like holding in tears and emotion, it’s exhausting keeping it dammed upside. It’s better to just let it go under controlled circumstances rather than exhaust ourselves trying to contain it.
Learn also when to make yourself do something (like go out with friends) and when to recognise you’re best staying at home. I’ve had times when I’ve dragged myself out to socialise and it hasn’t paid off. I’ve regretted it and wish I had stayed home. There just comes times when I am so deep down in the shaft of depression, wallowing in the mud, bruised and broken, the last thing I need is to deal with navigating the challenge of being social and trying to be cheery and socially correct and deal with people being idiots. When I’m that bad, nothing from my friends/family will comfort me, activities won’t help. I just have to wait it out. I know some people say rely on your friends/family when you’re that low but I find in certain situations it doesn’t help. It takes a very wise loved one to walk this fine balance of supporting you but leaving you alone to breath and recover and keeping an eye on you.
Depression takes a lot of self knowledge and awareness. It will teach you some brutal lessons. It will teach you many skills and coping mechanisms. I know this doesn’t negate your suffering, I know this. Do not be afraid to try medication. Do not be afraid of anything, in fact. This sounds very strange, I know. I can’t make any promises that your depression will just one day go and never come back, of course I hope it does, but I can say that fear makes depression worse. Don’t fear it, when it visits we can learn from it and grow as a person. If we have a self care plan to fall back on, it’s less frightening and we can manage as best as we can.
Mindfulness, yoga/stretching, cognitive behavioural therapy, sunlight, meditation, medication, a good diet, regular exercise, therapy, regular scheduled sleep, avoiding alcohol (it’s a depressive), some natural supplements, a self care plan (including a crisis one), a structured routine and stress management/reduction have all proven helpful for many many people. Low energy activities which we normally find pleasurable (reading, drinking cocoa before bed, lighting candles, adult colouring books, happy TV/Movies etc) It’ll take trial and error, find what works for you, to what degree, when to use it and build it all into your self care plan.
As for educating others, I recommend having website resources or print offs/hand outs you can give to people. Explaining depression can be very tiring and we often can’t find the words. People usually ask when we’re having an attack too, I find.
I am sorry you have to live with this in your life. I understand your pain, I really do.
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I can’t offer you a parents pov however I can offer you the pov of someone who was unhappy in her school environment and who has had friends who drank and/or smoked weed.
All the people I know who have smoked weed, which has been a lot, never touched hard drugs, even when they smoked large quantities of it. For many it was just a pleasure thing, for others it was a coping mechanism, for some it was for a new experience and to test the boundaries. Because of these things your brother’s use of weed isn’t that alarming to me. I’ve seen more of my friends hurt, long term and short term, by alcohol than weed.
I would personally be more concerned about the fact that weed is the symptom of what seems his general unhappiness or depression. This is what needs attention. It’s rough being a teen never mind when you are unhappy in your school environment. I’ve been in that situation. It’s horrendous. Right now he needs support and ways to help him cope. Look into seeing if something can be changed or added to his life to help him cope. Find out what he hates about the school. Is it the teachers, the other teens? Is he feeling under too much pressure from the school/friends/family? Is he being bullied? He has even made good friendships at his school? Perhaps it’s other factors too besides just school such as sexuality, worries about the future, the family, loneliness. He needs to talk to someone who will take him seriously, be non judgmental, truly listen to him and give him constructive ways to manage the situation. It needs to be someone who can remain emotionally detached and calm and compassionate. It’s important also that they look at things from all angles rather trying to press one persons view. It would be beneficial if he could choose who he talks to. Your family may think the priest would be a good idea, or the doctor, but your brother may feel no connection to that person which will not encourage him to open up. Don’t argue with him, just give him facts and ultimately, the decision is down to him.
And please, please treat him like an adult who knows his own mind. This doesn’t always mean giving him everything he wants but he must feel like his opinions and feelings truly matter. This was a problem I had when I was unhappy and no one took me seriously because I was “just a clueless teen” and it made things so much worse. It made me feel unimportant and that my life wasn’t my own. Especially because I was very self aware and mature for my age. There is nothing worse than being unhappy and people who are supposedly trying to help adding to the pain because they think you’re too inexperienced/young to know your own mind and own your opinions. Ditto to just being told to deal with it, suck it up or being too sensitive and that it doesn’t matter in comparison to the problems of other people.
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Loves2Pole: I use a webcam on my PC. I’m lucky in that my pole is in my lounge along with the PC and there’s a window sill I can put the cam on. The cable *just* reaches! You can however get USB extensions if it didn’t. I did have to play around with it a lot at first and it does have to record sideways for it to capture all of me. This is because it’s in a widescreen format. My webcam shoots in 720p and I edit in Windows Movie Maker. It’s more than enough for my needs. I wouldn’t have progressed anywhere near as fast if I didn’t use the camera, it’s fantastic.
I did consider just deleting my practice clips but for me they are also very much a journal of my progress. I think from now on I’ll just record my first one or two attempts on both sides, then just switch off and do the same over the next three weeks (I operate on a 3 week training plan). That way I should get a good picture of my progress but it’ll reduce how much video is created. Anyway I’ll give that a go and see how it works out!
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Hi Chem,
I do have some ladies boy shorts here but I’ve had problems with these too. The most common problem is the gusset being too narrow or the fabric just being thin/skimpy, or moving around or riding up. I could go on. I need look into Fruit of the Loom but they seem fairly hard to get hold of, even though the T-shirts are popular and easily available over here. With having so much challenge trying to find things that fit and meet the needs of pole dancing especially with moving into more open leg positions, I prefer to be able to physically touch things right now, rather than order online than risk wasted money. I accept that it could just be I’m wanting too much for my budget. I do want to try some KMK shorts in the future though 😛 I’m going to keep my eyes open for anything that might pop up here and there, I understand finding suitable things can take time. I’m in the UK and we don’t have a Target but our own stores which I go into now and then to check.
Never thought I’d see the day I’d need shorts, never mind more than one pair. The life of a pole dancer!
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Sometimes even with the best diets in the world, good quality sleep, supplements, hydration, high fitness levels etc us ladies still get hit by the drain caused by hormone changes or problems. I think you’ve done all you can to support your body. We’re highly complex biological machines and the process of fighting off bugs (even those we aren’t aware of), child rearing, hormone changes etc can’t help but take something from the body, even if “only” energy. Be gentle with yourself. I tend to change my focus if I feel flat, for whatever reason, and back off from the heavy stuff, and yes, often stop altogether. There is no harm in taking a rest and often it has huge benefits mentally and physically. I know it’s not a “fix” but you know, sometimes there’s nothing to be fixed!
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Hello ladies.
First of all I’m so sorry for just vanishing. I’ve been having an awful time with my health and that of my mother’s who is in a terribly stressful situation. As a consequence I slacked off on poling and also my stretching. I will begin again tomorrow and try to have some actual progress pictures at the end of April.It was so lovely to see all your photos and comments and ladies still joining in. It’s really inspiring and ignited the fire back within me and I hope to journey alongside you all again. Keep at it everyone, and remember even if you drop off, you can always start up again!
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I have a kidney infection so I’m having to drop off any form of working out right now. I feel horrendous! I’m becoming best friends with my hot water bottle, painkillers and my bed. My pole is silently crying! Oh well, I’ll get back on track in a week or two 🙂
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lol Veena, don’t worry, we all have our moments! I was sat there for a few minutes trying to figure it out in my head.
Robyn thank you for reminding me about toe polish, I think I’ll do that to hide the nasty toes going on atm!
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Scarlet: It needs to be done when you’re very very warm. For this reason it’s recommended to do it after a workout though that’s not always practical. When first beginning limit it to once a week and I think it’s after 4 weeks, you can increase it to twice a week. I hope that helps 🙂
Lilfairie: oh gosh training with a bump 😀 Your journey will be very interesting!
It’s so exciting to see everyone joining in. I will do some training when I get home from class tonight, if I have the energy! It was a bit mad after all the Christmas and New Year madness going on and I didn’t get the sessions in that I wanted so I could increase two twice a week stretching. I’m still on the conditioning programme too so it’s been hard juggling rest days, activity and the resulting tiredness.
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Hi everyone,
I no longer kick into inverts. I’m stronger now and can invert without doing so which means I no longer need to worry about kicking the pole either! I stopped doing it when I found out online this is not how you should be taught and then my strength improved and so did my technique once I signed up to Veena’s lessons. I just cringe when my other class mates are told to do this. It’s just upsetting to be taught in a way that can hurt you because it’s not really what you want to pay for, is it?!
Veena: What do you mean by no heel hooking for inverts? In the invert video we’re told to hook the back of the heel with the leading leg, so are you talking about something different? Also, I’m nowhere near to anything fancy like half cartwheel so no worries there lol. Even though our teacher says we’re intermediate level I’ve confined myself to the beginner moves on here!
Lucca: I’m getting my shoulder/arm investigated by a sports massage therapist to figure out what’s going on. It’s not nerve pain, I don’t think it’s tendon either, it feels muscular. I think it’s because our classes have progressed too fast and we’re doing a lot of moves that involve hanging off the pole. There’s no mirrors and no instruction on engaging the upper body. Luckily it’s my last class with that school this week. I’ll be trying a new one to see if they’re any better. I hope they are or I don’t know where that’ll leave me :/